Walk Away

I grudgingly pulled myself out of bed this morning. I was not looking forward to school and seeing Adam. But, I had promised Zoey that I would talk to him about their date. I really hoped that he liked Zoey because she's such a sweet girl. She dropped me off at my house last night even though I didn't ask her to and it was completely out of her way. I took a quick shower and went downstairs for breakfast. I was surprised to see Henry there.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him, a little rudely. I'm really not a morning person. I softened the tone of my voice. "I mean, what are you doing here?"

"Your mom let me in. I figured we can grab breakfast on the way to school," he said, smiling. I don't know about any of the other mornings, but this morning, he was awfully chipper. "What do you say, Court? You game?" I really didn't want to go out for breakfast. I wasn't in an extrovert mood this morning.

"No, I don't feel like going out right now," I told him. He looked disappointed. So I said, "Hey, I'll make us some breakfast here. What do you want? Pancakes sound good?" He nodded. I grabbed the pancake mix (yes, I can't cook from scratch, I fail at cooking) and make a two stacks.

"Here you go," I said, setting his stack in front of him. I handed him the maple syrup. I sat down next to him with my stack and started wolfing them down.

"Slow down or you're going to choke," he said, laughing. I looked at him.

"I have to go early so I can talk to Adam," I told him, with my mouth full. Yes, it's a really attractive quality that I have.

"Oh? What do you have to talk to him about?" Henry asked curiously. "Wait, let me guess, you're going to profess your feelings for him." I couldn't tell if he was being sarcastic or if he actually meant it.

"Adam and I are just friends," I told him, firmly. He laughed.

"I was joking," he said, smirking. "Someone's defensive." I smack him on the arm.

"Someone needs to hurry up!" I told him, rolling my eyes. He didn't say anything to me after that. He did start to eat faster though. I smiled to myself.

I practically ran to his truck. I wanted to get this over as soon as possible. Henry was making fun of me the whole ride to school and making kissy noises. I imagined this is what it would be like to have a brother. Boy, was I glad I didn't have a brother. When I got out of his truck, he attempted to follow me, but I shooed him away. I wasn't going to let other people witness the obviously awkwardness between Adam and I. I found Adam at his locker, where he usually was at this time.

"Hey!" I said to him. I was just going to jump right into it. "How was your date the other night?"

"Good," he said, not looking at me.

"Um, well, do you like her?" I asked him.

"Yeah, I do," he said. He seemed annoyed. He turned to look at me. "Listen, I shouldn't be speaking to you now that I'm dating Zoey. I really like her and I don't want things to get awkward in the relationship when I tell her what happened between the two of us. I think it's best if we don't talk to each other." He slammed his locker shut and walked away, leaving me speechless.

Unsure

"Come on, Court!" Taylor pleaded with me from his car. "It's been over a week. You said we'd talk."

I sighed. It was the third time that he had followed me to school this week. Doesn't he have anything better to do with his time than to stalk me? Ok, stalk isn't the right term- follow! Doesn't he have anything better to do with his time than to follow me? Obviously no, since he's been following me to school three days in a row.

"Taylor, please," I said, exasperated. "I really don't want to talk about this right now."

"No, Courtney!" he said, his voice demanding. He started to get angry. "I've been waiting for you to talk to me and this is getting ridiculous. I just want to talk to you, don't shut me out!"

I looked around. Cars were honking at him. He was blocking the right lane by being parked on the side of the road. People were shouting at him to "Move!" and "Get off the road!". Gosh, people in Beachside are not happy at 7:30 in the morning. They should get a cup of coffee or something. I rolled my eyes at the honking cars.

"Please, Courtney, just get in the car," he pleaded desperately with me. "Please."

I sighed and finally gave in. I was tired of all the angry people yelling at us. I just wanted to get this over with. So, I got in the car with Taylor. He smiled when I got in, looking like he had won a battle.

"I wore you down," he said, smirking.

"Just drive, Taylor," I told him.

He drove us to the parking lot of the school and we sat there awkwardly, both not wanting to be the first person to say anything. Finally, I broke the silence.

"Taylor, I'm going to be honest with you," I said. "I don't know if I can ever trust you. I'll never be sure that you're over Farrah. How do I know that you're not going to run back over to her? Even if you say that you won't, I can't believe you. I mean, you've already done it twice already."

He looked sad. He was silent, as if contemplating on how to reassure me.

"I don't know what to tell you, Court," he said, finally. "No matter what I say, you won't believe a word I'm saying. But, I'll try to get through to you. I can't really promise you anything. I can't promise you that our relationship will be perfect. I can't promise you that our relationship will make it. I can't promise you that you'll fall in love with me. I can't promise you that Farrah and I won't get back together because I do care about her. All I can say is that I need you to trust me. I really do love you, please just let me show it to you."

"I don't know, Taylor," I said, sadly. "I really don't know."

The nagging voice in my head came back. Just go with the flow, Court. The worst that can happen is that the two of you break up again. If you can get through it once, you can get through it again. If it works out, you'll have a great relationship.

I knew that the voice in my head was right. I knew that he had screwed up and I haven't really forgiven him, but I really wanted to work our problems out.

"Ok, Taylor, I'll give it a shot," I told him, a little unsure of my decision. "But, you're on probation."

Sneaky

When I woke up Monday morning, I was exhausted. I could barely open my eyes, let alone get out of bed. But, like a trooper, I pulled myself out of bed and got ready for school. I attempted to find all of my books and shoved that into my backpack. Hoping that I didn't leave any assignments in my room, I made my way to school.

After a minute or two of walking, I was getting this weird feeling like I'm being watched. I turned around and didn't see anyone. I tried to shrug it off and kept walking. As I kept walking, I had this undeniable sinking feeling in the bottom of my stomach that someone was following me. I turned around again and this time, Taylor was following me in his car.

When he noticed that I had seen him, he pulled over to the side of the road and rolled his window down.

"Hey, I'll give you a ride to school," he told me. "Get in the car."

"No, thank you," I told him. "I'm going to walk."

"Please, just get in the car, Court," he told me.

"No, Taylor!" I almost yelled. "I want to walk!"

He left me alone after that. I continued walking to school with Taylor's car trailing me the entire time. I must admit that it looked really odd. He ended up catching up to me after, what I assume is, parking his car.

"Did you get my messages?" he asked me, softly.

"Yes, all 17 of them," I told him. "This isn't the place or time to talk about this. I have to put things in my locker and I have a test today. I don't want you to stress me out before my test."

That was an outright lie. I didn't have a test today, but I really didn't want to talk to him right now. Not at school, not in front of everyone. I didn't want to burst out in tears and have half the school talking about me.

"Ok, Court," he said, sadly. "I'll talk to you later."

I dumped all of my books into my locker and I went to my 1st period. I sat down at an empty desk and took out my materials. Logan came in and sat down next to me, which I found weird. We hadn't spoken since he informed me that Haylie was pregnant.

"Hey, what's up?" I asked him.

"Nothing much, how about you?" he asked me.

"Am I a horrible person?" I asked him, bluntly. I tried to be as quiet as I could. "Do I have some sort of characteristic where it makes it ok to cheat on me or cheat with me? Why am I surrounded by a bunch of people who cheat?"

Logan looked surprised that I was unloading all of this on him. It took a minute for him to wipe that look off of his face and reply to me.

"You're not a horrible person," he told me, after taking a deep breath. "You're a really beautiful, smart, sweet girl. I'm not sure if you have a characteristic that makes you prone to being cheated on and cheated with because you really don't deserve to be cheated on or be the "other woman". I didn't mean to cheat on you, really. I'm just a coward and I didn't have the courage to break up with you."

I was silent, I wasn't sure what to say to that.

"I'm really sorry that I wasn't upfront with you during our relationship," he said. He sounded really apologetic.

"I appreciate the apology, but it's in the past," I told him. "So, how are things with you and Haylie?"

"Oh, we broke up over the break," he told me. "She lied to me about being pregnant. I think she just wanted me to marry her."

"Why would she want to marry you?" I asked him. I quickly realized how bad that sounded, coming out of my mouth. "I mean, is there something for her to gain?"

"Well, my grandmother passed away," he told me. "She left me some money. I won't have access to it until I'm 18, but it's a large sum of money. Haylie had gone with me when my grandmother's will was read and she told me she was pregnant a couple of days afterwards."

"How did you find out she wasn't pregnant?" I asked him, curiously.

"She refused to see a doctor and I dragged her to one, kicking and screaming," he told me. "He told me that there was no sign of a baby. I didn't remember seeing her exhibit morning sickness once during the whole "pregnancy", which I thought was strange. She wasn't exhibiting any other signs of pregnancy either. I can only assume that she was after my money when I gain access to it when I'm 18. I confronted her and well.. She didn't handle the break up very well."

I didn't know what to say to Logan. All I could think about was how sick and twisted this whole thing was.

All In My Head

I was on my way to the school library to do some studying for my finals. I had decided that this was the perfect place to hide. I'm pretty sure that Haylie has never set foot in a library and that Adam was too busy filling his empty stomach to realize that I was hiding here. I knew that I had to confront them sooner or later, but I'm choosing later. On the bright side, I'm getting some studying done.

As soon as I stepped foot in the library, I saw Sarah sitting alone at an empty table. I wasn't really surprised. Separating Sarah from a library is like separating peanut butter and jelly. It cannot and should not be done. She waved at me and motioned for me to take a seat at the table she was at. I smiled and walked to her table.

"Hey, fancy seeing you here," she greeted me in a whisper. I smiled.

"Yeah, I have to study for physiology," I told her. She nodded, understanding how much I needed to study for the class. She had taken the course last year.

I felt bad for not telling Sarah about seeing Haylie and Adam together, but there was no need to spread around rumors on something that I haven't confirmed to be true. I didn't want another incident like the one I was in. I had asked around and no one knew how the rumor started. They didn't know how it had erupted into such a circus. When I heard about Tiger Woods and his situation, I instantly felt bad for him. I knew, to some extent, how he was feeling.

I opened my physiology book and started to make flashcards. Five minutes into studying, I looked up and saw Sarah waving at someone. I looked over to where she was looking at. I saw Adam standing at the doorway. Oh no. He walked over and sat down next to me.

"I feel like you've been avoiding me, Courtney," he whispered to me. "What's wrong?"

Sarah looked uncomfortable. She didn't do well in stressful situations involving people.

"Um, I'm going to go," Sarah said, softly. "I'll talk to you guys later." She picked up all of her books and walked away. I gathered my books and walked out behind her, with Adam following me.

"I'm not avoiding you," I told him. "I've just been busy. I've had a lot of stuff on my mind."

"You know you can talk to me about anything," he said. "What's wrong?" I took a deep breath and sighed.

"Well, I saw you and Haylie out the other day," I told him, quickly. "Together. Like a couple. I mean, I can imagine why you'd want to keep it a secret and not tell anyone, but I'm your best friend and it hurts me that you can't tell me something like that." I took a breath. Adam looked at me like I was crazy.

"Oh!" he said, realizing what I was talking about. "You're talking about the dinner I had with Haylie."

"Yes," I said, nodding.

"I didn't want to tell you this," he said. "I thought I could handle it myself."

"What is it?" I asked him. He took a deep breath and paused. He opened his mouth and the words came out.

"Court, Haylie's doing drugs," he said, softly.

Down

My parents made me go to school today. They personally drove me to make sure that I wouldn't ditch. I walked in the hallways and it immediately got quiet. I let out a sigh. Here we go again. I ignored the silence and walked to Physiology. I took my seat in the back as usual and pull out all of my materials. People were whispering around me.

"I think she got an abortion! That's why she was gone last week." I heard a girl whisper. I rolled my eyes and put my earphones in. I rather listen to my music than listen to my class gossip about me. I scrolled through my playlist until I found the song I was looking for, "Bad Day" by Daniel Powter.

I saw Logan walk in when the song was over. I smiled. He sat down next to me and kissed my forehead. He took out one of the earphones and whispered "I love you" into my ear. I couldn't help but smile. I took out my other earphone and put my iPod away.

"How was your Thanksgiving?" Logan asked, smiling.

"It was ok," I said, smiling. "We had way too much turkey and stuffed ourselves way to much. You should have came, it would have been fun! Especially Black Friday shopping with Adam and I."

"You went Black Friday shopping?" he asked, surprised. I saw his smile fade away. "With Adam?"

"Yeah, Adam and I camped out outside of Best Buy," I said, my smile wavering. "We had a tent, a sleeping bag, turkey sandwiches, and drinks. It was definitely fun camping out just the two of us all night." I wanted to kick myself. Please just shut up. I told myself. But I didn't do anything wrong. I argued with myself.

"Why didn't you ask me to come?" he asked me, his tone accusing. I sighed. I didn't want to fight with Logan. I was getting annoyed at his tone though.

"Babe, I asked you to dinner," I said, calmly. "You didn't want to come, so I assumed that you didn't want to come Black Friday shopping either. You said you were busy."

"I don't trust him around you," he said, angrily.

"You don't trust me?" I asked him, angrily. "You think that I'm going to cheat on you with the first guy I see?"

"You did steal someone's boyfriend," he spat out. "Who knows what else you could do?"

I gasped. It was like someone pierced my heart. The classroom was silent. Tears swelled to my eyes. I had told him that in confidence. He knew that I wasn't that person anymore, yet he had to throw it out during an argument. He had to throw it out in front of people who were already viciously gossiping about me. He gave them more ammo to make my life miserable. He betrayed my trust.

"Screw you, Logan!" I shouted. I picked up all of my stuff and stormed out of the room.

"No, Courtney, wait!" I heard Logan shout behind me.

The Shirt

Well, I guess I fell asleep because the next thing I knew, it was morning. Adam had his arm around me and we were sleeping really close together. It was kinda awkward.. To make things worse, he had a boner. I knew it was due to the fact that it's 7 in the morning and not because he's attracted to me.

I took his arm off of me and gently slipped out of his bed. I turned off the TV and grabbed my phone. There were no new messages. Brittany must have assumed that I slept over here. It wasn't unusual for me to fall asleep at my friends' houses after a night of studying. Our parents know each other well enough to allow such a thing.

"Hey," I said, shaking Adam. "Wake up. It's 7. Wake up or we're not going to make it to school."

"I'll be up in a little," he mumbled. "You can use my shower. I'll let you borrow one of my shirts."

"Ok," I said.

I think he was a little embarrassed about his boner and didn't want me to know about it. I really felt sorry for guys. I mean, sure, women have to have periods every month and they have to bear children and give birth, but guys have to conceal their boners.. That's super embarrassing! I couldn't imagine having to go through that as a pre-teen or now.

I took a quick shower and realized that I didn't take a shirt with me before I went in the bathroom. I wrapped the towel around myself and went into his room.

"Don't look!" I said. "I didn't grab a shirt before I went in." I didn't want him to see me in nothing but a towel. We're close, but not that close.

I tried to grab the shirt as quick as I could and jumped back into the bathroom. I changed and went to brush my teeth. I had my own toothbrush here. I felt so special! I went back into his room.

"All yours," I said. He got out of bed.

"Took you long enough," he joked.

"Haha, hurry up," I told him. It bugged me that my hair was wet, but Adam didn't own a hair dryer. He didn't believe in them. He's so weird. He came out of the shower in less than ten minutes.

We barely made it to school on time. It seemed like all of the traffic lights were red just to spite us. Well, I made it to my seat just before the bell rang. The teacher was MIA.

"Hey," I said to Logan. I put my stuff down. He looked at me. "What is it?"

"Isn't that shirt a little big for you?" he asked.

"Oh, I was studying at Adam's house last night and I fell asleep," I said. "I had to borrow one of his shirts." He looked skeptical.

"Uh huh," he said, in disbelief. "Let me guess, his shirt was off and his pants were down. What? Let me guess. He made you dinner and then he got in your pants." I rolled my eyes.

"What is your problem?" I said, angrily. "Who do you think you are? You don't even know me. You've known me for two seconds. What I do and what I don't do is none of your concern. Controlling much? You don't own me. I can do whatever I want."

Logan didn't say anything. He looked away sheepishly and stayed quiet for the rest of the class period, which was fine by me.

I couldn't get to my statistics class fast enough.

"Hey, Court," Haylie greeted me. She noticed my shirt. "Another study night at Adam's?" I nodded. Someone who understands! She only understands because she's been to one of our study sessions and she also fell asleep. Adam will offer anyone the shirt off of his back. In this case, the shirt from his dresser.

"Logan was being an asshole and accusing me of sleeping with Adam," I said.

"Not the cute barista!" She exclaimed. "Wait, you do know that Adam is secretly in love with you, right?" I laughed hysterically.

"Thanks, Hales, for the laugh," I said. "Cheered me up."

"No, really," she said, seriously. "Look at all of the things that he does for you."

"Hun, they're the same things I do for you!" I exclaimed. "We're good friends, you know that! You're being ridiculous!"

"If you say so," she said, shrugging.

Haylie has an overactive imagination. You can't really blame her, she's more on the creative side. At least she puts that talent to good use and writes short stories.

"How's your arm, sweetie?" I asked her. I felt bad that I didn't ask her before I went into my "Logan is an asshole" thing.

"It's fine," she said, annoyed. "I wish people would stop asking. It's a broken arm. It'll heal." I laughed.

"We're just worried about you," I said. I remembered Taylor's text. "Taylor texted me last night." Haylie looked both shocked and scared. Pretty much the same face I had last night.

"No," she said. "You're joking." I shook my head.

"He said, hey stranger," I said.

"What did you do?" she asked. "Did you text him back?"

"No," I said. "Why would I?"

"I'm glad you didn't," she said. "I wouldn't be able to stand it if he hurt you again."

Deja Vu.

First Day of Senior Year

When I woke up today, the first thought that popped into my head was "Oh, boy."

It was the first day of school. Usually, I'm excited, but with Haylie in the hospital, I'm really not in the mood for school. I just want to go over to the hospital and stay by her side. I dragged myself out of bed and tried stay positive. I'm going to need some positiveness if I'm going to send Haylie some positive energy. Her parents didn't give me an update yet, probably because they were up all night worrying.

I was planning on walking to school, but when I got outside, Adam was waiting for me in his car. I couldn't say I was surprised. Adam and I were really close. I've known him as long as I've known Haylie. Adam was amazing. He's cute, sweet, and funny. If you need a favor, he is there in a heartbeat. Don't let his blond hair and blue eyes fool you, he's as smart as Albert Einstein.

"Hey, Mr. Smith, are you here to give me a ride?" I asked, smiling.

"Hop in, Mrs. Smith," he laughed. Everyone in our own little group referred to us as Mr. and Mrs. Smith. I don't remember when we were dubbed that, but it was pretty funny. Adam did look a little like Brad and I did look a little like Angie minus the gorgeous face. "Do you want to stop for breakfast?"

"Of course!" I exclaimed. He knows just how to distract me and cheer me up. He brought us to a drive-thru and ordered my favorite breakfast burrito with some orange juice. I fished out my wallet but he wouldn't hear of it. He's such a gentleman. He doesn't believe that the girl should pay for anything. I took a sip of my juice.

"Do you want to go see Hales after school?" He asked. I nodded.

For the rest of the ride to Beachside, we tried to see if we had any classes together. We only had psychology together and that was near the middle of the day. We finally got on campus. The thing about our campus is that it overlooks the beach and the ocean. It's amazing to see the gorgeous blue sky and the white sand everyday.

Adam came around the side and opened the door for me. He's so nice that way. He walked me to my physiology class while talking about rounding up the group to see Haylie.

I took a seat in the back of the class. I was never one to sit in the front of the class. I figured out that teachers tend to call on those who sit in the front. I don't have a problem sitting near the middle, but I'm closer to the back door where I'm currently sitting. I put my backpack on my desk and started to watch people walk in the door. To my surprise, Logan walked in. He saw me and took a seat next to me.

"Hey, you," I said, smiling. "You remembered me."

"Course," He said, laughing. "Can't forget a pretty face." I laughed nervously. I was not pretty. That boy needs glasses or something. Maybe he hit his head on his locker or something. I was not pretty.

"Sure," I said.

"So, was that your boyfriend I saw you with?" he asked, coolly. I burst out laughing. I couldn't help it. The thought of dating Adam was just so ridiculous.

"Adam?" I said, laughing. "I think you made my day. We're really close friends. I've known him since I was in preschool. It would be insanely weird if we were dating."

"Oh, you guys looked like you guys were dating," he said. "I saw you getting out of his car when I was in the parking lot."

He sounded a little jealous. Maybe it's just me and I'm suffering a bout of hallucination or something. I decided not to push it and not give him the third degree. I'm pretty sure he has a girlfriend and I don't want to look like an idiot.

"Yep, just friends," I said. The bell rang signalling that class had started.

After class, Logan insisted on walking me to my statistics class.

"Do you want to get together after school and work on the psych assignment?" he asked.

"No, I can't, I have to go to the hospital," I said.

"Why?" he asked, curiously.

"I'm going to visit my best friend Haylie," I said. "We were in a car accident yesterday and I managed to come out with a couple of bruises, but she has a broken arm and they had to keep her overnight. Oh, wait." I checked my phone and there was a message from Mrs. Conner.

Haylie's doing fine. We're taking her home right now.

"Scratch that, we're going over to her house." I said. "Her parents took last night off and today off so they could be with her." Her parents were workaholics and usually worked at night.

We stood outside of my stats class and I waited for him to say something, but he didn't.

"Um, ok, I'm going to go to class," I said. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah, bye," he replied. I went to my stats class.

There was nothing interesting that happened at school. I managed to have someone I knew in every single one of my classes so if I get lost, someone can catch me up.

After school, we ended up getting Henry and Sarah to join us. Justin couldn't come because he had to go to work. He worked at this really cool bookstore. It keeps him pretty busy. He barely has enough time for Sarah let alone the rest of us. Sarah and Justin have been together since... Since.. I don't remember. That's how long they've been together. I think it was somewhere in 7th grade when they started seeing each other.

"We're here, guys," Adam announced, parking his car on the street.

We piled out of the car and I let us in with my spare key. Mr. and Mrs. Conner gave me a key to their house when Haylie and I started high school. They actually trusted me with the key more than Hales. She tends to lose things easily.

"Hey, kids," Mr. Conner greeted us. "Hale Bale is upstairs watching TV."

"Thanks, Mr. Conner," Sarah said, politely. We headed upstairs and went in Haylie's room.

"Hey guys," she greeted us, smiling. "How was the first day of senior year?"

"That doesn't matter, " I said.

"What matters is you," Henry jumped in. I tried not to roll my eyes.

"That's really sweet," Haylie said. "But, I'm fine. Just a little bruised, a broken arm, and little head injury. I don't have a concussion. I'm fine, guys. Just gotta learn how to text with one hand." She smiled.

"Have you heard from.." Sarah trailed off.

"Nope," Haylie said. "We're broken up. I mean, Court, you saw how he was in the car last night."

"Yeah, I'm really glad you guys took your time in your relationship," I said. I glanced over at Henry. I could see that he was silently cheering. I could tell that he wanted to be Haylie's first. I honestly don't know if they would ever end up together. They would make a nice couple.

"We should let you get some rest," Adam said. "You must be exausted." She nodded.

"Ok, guys," she said. "I'll see you guys tomorrow at school." We said our goodbyes to her.

Adam drove each of us home.

I sat in my room wondering about Logan. Was he trying to ask me out for today? Was it supposed to be a study date? Maybe that was why he acted kinda funny. I don't know. I really suck with guys.