Oh No

I sat down on the couch next to Adam, waiting for him to respond to my question. He looked like he really needed someone to talk to. But, right now, he was just sitting there, staring into space as if trying to think of what to say. We sat in silence. I didn't want to push him. I wanted him to talk to me when he was ready.

"Do you want something to drink?" I asked him, sweetly. I was a little bit nervous and sort of freaking out. "I have some root beer if you like some root beer. I think I have some orange juice or something. Or water! I have some water! I could make you some tea to help calm you down. I think I'll make you some tea." I ran into the kitchen, without waiting for his answer, and started to make Adam a cup of tea.

I didn't know what to do when these kind of situations come up. The few times that it happened, I would get him a drink (and chocolate) and then we'll sit and we'll talk about what's going on.

I finished making the tea and I plated some chocolate chip cookies before bringing in the feast. Well, I fixed two glasses of milk to go along with the cookies.

"Thanks, Court," he said, when he grabbed a cookie.

"No problem, Adam," I told him, smiling. "You know I'm here for you. Whenever you're ready, we can talk." He took a bite out of his cookie.

"I really liked her," he whispered. "I can't believe she broke up with me." I patted his arm.

"It'll be ok, Adam," I told him, taking a sip of milk. "What happened?"

"We were at my house," he said. He paused for a second. "Your birthday's coming up, so I was looking online for some gifts. Zoey saw one of the things that I was looking at and demanded to know who it was for."

"Why would she assume that it's for someone else and not for her?" I wondered aloud. "My birthday's not until next month. Oh, sorry, go on."

"Well, it wasn't her style," he explained. "I had mumbled your name and she went crazy. She was screaming at me, completely screaming in my face. She had accused me of cheating on her with you and that I was in love with you-" I looked at him.

"You're not, right?" I asked him, with an eyebrow raised.

"No!" he exclaimed. "I used to be. Well, I'll always love you, but I'm not in love with you."

"Ok, good," I said. I just left it like that, I wanted to get off the subject. Honestly, I don't even know why I asked. "What else did Zoey say?"

"She called you a couple of names and she threw my alarm clock at me," he said, with a sad look on his face. "It's a good thing that she has really bad aim. But, she told me that we were over. I tried to stop her. I tried to tell her that none of the things she said was true. I tried to stop her from leaving. She wouldn't listen." He had started crying again. I hated seeing him so sad.

"There, there," I said, patting him on the back. "I'm sure that once she calms down and you talk to her, that everything will be ok."

"No, I don't think so," he said, blowing his nose in a tissue I handed to him.

"She quit her job to be with you," I told him. "When we used to be friends, she abosolutely liked you. A lot. I don't think that the two of you are going to break up that easily. Just talk to her in a couple of days."

My stomach felt really weird and started to make weird noises. Then, I got the feeling that I was going to throw up. I ran to the bathroom.

When I came out 5 minutes later, I found Adam standing in the hallway.

"Are you ok?" he asked me. I nodded.

"I think it was the milk," I said, groaning. Adam nodded, frowning.

"Good thing I didn't have any," he said. I smiled at him and followed him back into the living room.

Inside, I wasn't so sure that it was the milk. I had been feeling nauseous on and off. I was a couple of days late for my period, which was a little unusual. I never had a late period since I got on birth control. I gulped.

Could I be pregnant?

Ridin' Solo

Henry and I are taking things slowly, very slowly. We weren't even official yet and no one knew about our secret relationship (except for Brittany). It was kind of fun being all secretive and hiding what we were doing from Adam, Justin, Haylie, and Sarah. It wasn't that hard, we weren't really doing anything- unless you count watching a movie at his house on our day off this weekend as something.

Like, today, we were at my house, giving my cat a bath before watching a movie. Giving a cat a bath is harder than trying to get out of a speeding ticket. Not to state the obvious, but, cats hate water. They'll drink it like there's no tomorrow, but once they hear that faucet going, they think the water's going to kill them or something. I love my cat to death, but seriously, giving her a bath is my least favorite thing. Henry is such a sweetheart for volunteering to hold her, so she wouldn't squirm away, while I gave her the bath. I didn't even care that it was supposed to be Brittany's turn to give her a bath.

"Thank you so much for helping me give her a bath," I said, while trying to try off my little girl. She was squirming in my arms and I kissed her on the head and let her do her thing. "I know that you didn't have to help me. It's not part of your job description." I wasn't funny. I should try to stop trying to be. I laughed nervously. It was weird being nervous around Henry.

"You're welcome, anything for you," Henry said, pulling me in his arms and kissed me on the forehead. All of a sudden, I wasn't nervous anymore.

I smiled as I watched my cat try to dry herself off unsuccessfully. Brittany and I never really named her and we can't really call her "kitty" anymore. I had resorted to calling her "my little girl" or "baby".

"What do you want to do now?" Henry asked me, interrupting my thoughts about getting another cat for my baby.

"I don't know," I said, shrugging. "Do you want to watch that movie you brought over?" Henry had brought over this movie called Avatar. I don't know if it's any good, but supposedly, everyone went to see it while it was in theaters. I wasn't particularly excited to see the movie, but Henry really wanted to watch it, so.. whatever.

"Yes!" he said, excitedly. Apparently, he really loved this movie. I was happy that he wanted to share it with me.

We went downstairs, into the living room, and he popped the movie in while I made the popcorn. The microwave beeped right when I got done pouring the root beers. The popcorn smelled so good! Extra buttered popcorn was my favorite. It was a good thing that Henry loved the stuff too. I brought in the popcorn and the drinks and saw that Henry had the movie paused in the beginning. I set everything down and cuddled up next to him.

"Ok, you can press play now," I said, smiling.

Henry pressed play and put an arm around me. I had almost fallen asleep (not because the movie was boring, but because I was so comfortable in Henry's arms), but I was startled by the sound of my doorbell ringing. I fell off the couch.

"Are you ok?" Henry asked me, concerned. I nodded.

"I'm fine, the doorbell scared me," I said, rubbing my knee. I hit it on the coffee table. I walked slowly to the door. I was surprised to see Adam when I looked through my peephole. When I had opened the door, I saw that he had been crying (which I had seen happen once or twice in all the time I've known him).

"Hey, what's wrong?" I asked him. "Are you ok?"

"Zoey just broke up with me," he said, with a whimper in his voice. "Can I talk to you?" I nodded.

"Sure, come on in, Adam," I said, moving out of the way. He went in and stopped when he saw Henry sitting in the living room eating his popcorn.

"Are you busy?" Adam asked, with a hint of sadness in his voice. "I could come back later if you're busy."

"No, she's not busy," Henry said, after taking one look on Adam's face. He knew as well as I did that this was serious. "I was just leaving." He got up.

"Thanks, man," Adam said. "I just really have to talk to Court."

"No problem," Henry said, patting him on the back.

"I'll walk you out," I offered.

"No," Henry said, shaking his head. "You take care of Adam. I'll talk to you later." I let him out.

"So, what happened?" I asked Adam.

Graduation (Part II)

I was trying not to grin from Henry's compliment the whole ride to the University, which was really difficult. I kept myself busy by talking about the wedding with Justin and Sarah. Both sounded really excited about the wedding and heading off to college t0gether. It's really cute how happy and in love they are. We ended up on the subject of what to do after the graduation ceremony.

"My dad's having a having a graduation party," I said. "You're all welcome to come, but my family will be there, so there much be some family drama. So, I don't know if you guys, and your families, are up for it."

"That sounds like fun," Sarah said, smiling. "Not the family drama, but the graduation party part. I think my parents would love to come. They love your dad! Justin, baby, do you want to go?"

"Sure, honey, whatever you want," Justin said, not taking his eyes off the road. I really think that if Sarah said that the moon was made of chocolate, Justin would have agreed with her. It's his way of letting Sarah gets what she wants so there are no arguments. I wonder if that's how they lasted so long.

"Anyone else?" I asked, trying not to smile at my thought.

"I'm there," Haylie and Adam said at the same time. I laughed. I took a deep breath.

"Henry, do you want to come?" I asked, shyly.

"I can't, my family flew in from New York last night and we're already planning on having dinner together," he said, with a twinge of sadness. "I promise I'll make it up to you." I nodded.

"Someone's got a date!" Haylie teased, playfully. I was too far away to elbow her in the ribs, so Sarah gladly did it for me.

I thought I saw jealousy flash across Adam's face for a second when he heard Haylie say that, but I shook my head in disbelief. I was going crazy. Adam was happy with Zoey. It was just my imagination, I decided.

"Oh, please, it'll be the end of the world before Courtney and Henry start dating," Sarah said, jokingly.

Why would Sarah say that? Is it really THAT far-fetched for me and Henry to date? I wanted to ask her, but I closed my mouth as soon as I opened it.

"We're here!" Justin announced, when we pulled into the parking lot.

I was right. After we had parked the car, we headed into the theater (I call it a theater, Justin says it's an auditorium) and we were forced to line up in alphabetical order for one last practice. The practice went smoothly. Brittany and I chatted throughout the whole practice.

We stood outside behind the theater for half an hour while everyone's families and friends piled into the theater. It felt like an eternity before we got the signal to go inside. I tried my best to not to trip as we walked inside, sitting down in our designated seats.

It felt like a dream- an out-of-body experience. I couldn't believe that I was actually graduating! I was mesmerized by the crowd of people who were here to support the class of 2010- so mesmerized that I completely missed the speeches. Well, it was intentional. I knew that my dad was getting all of this on tape, so I don't have to listen to the boring speeches about how we survived 4 years of high school and how we are the future. Oh, and our valedictorian, Jonathan Wo? He took out the complete band section when he went up to make his speech. Talk about humor.

Pretty soon, the first row got the signal to stand up and walk towards the stage and the principal was calling out names for their diploma (diploma sleeve).

"Avril Abel," the principal said.

A girl walked up and posed as she shook the superintendent's hand while receiving her diploma. We were warned that there was a photographer there and that we should look at the camera. Pretty soon, it was my row's turn to stand up.

"Congrats, sis," Brittany whispered to me as we walked towards the stage to line up.

"Right back at you, Britt," I said, hugging her. It wasn't long before we heard Brittany's name being called. "Knock them dead, sis."

She gracefully walked onto the stage and smiled brilliantly for the camera. She looked so excited to get her diploma. I watched her walk off the stage before my name was called. I took a deep breath before walking on stage, careful not to trip.

"Congratulations, Courtney," the principal said to me. I smiled at her. After getting my diploma, I saw that Brittany had stopped in her tracks and was staring at something. I walked up to her and grabbed her hand.

"What's wrong?" I asked her. "We're supposed to go back to our seats."

Then, I saw what she was looking at. Taylor was in the front row with a huge sign that said "Courtney, I love you. Please forgive me!".

Graduation (Part I)

Graduation day came up faster than I expected. I mean, even with all the graduation practices, I didn't feel ready for the actual ceremony. I had a bad feeling that I was going to trip on my dress or fall on my face. I just have that ominous feeling that something bad is going to happen. I couldn't help but feel extremely nervous about tonight. I felt completely nauseous about the whole ordeal.

It had been a couple of days since Henry and I shared that kiss, well.. kisses. I don't really know what's happening between us, we haven't talked about what happened. We've kind of avoided the subject every time we saw each other. That night, after we kissed on the beach, he brought me home and walked me up to the front door. He gave me a hug and practically ran away. He peeled out of my driveway like there was no tomorrow.

...That wasn't really reassuring that he returned my feelings. We haven't even talked to each other outside of school and usually we chat over the phone, but he hasn't called me since we kissed. Maybe he thought it was a mistake?

Logan, on the other hand, kept calling me non-stop. He wanted me to come over. I came over yesterday, but nothing happened. I'm actually really glad that nothing happened with everything that's up in the air with Henry. But, that didn't mean that Logan didn't try anything while we were watching a movie.

I really needed to have a talk with Henry. I don't know how much longer I can resist Logan's advances.

Brittany came into my room, wearing a black sequined mini-dress. She had her hair in beautiful curls. I was instantly jealous of her gorgeous blonde hair. Sometimes, I wondered what it would be like to be a blonde instead of a brunette.

"Nervous?" she asked me. I nodded.

"Really nervous," I told her. I pointed to my 3-inch heels next to my bed. "I'm going to trip and fall, I know it."

"I'm sure Dad will catch it on tape," she said, laughing. I laughed along with her until we realized what was going to happen. Our family's coming to graduation.

Anyone who is near California is coming to our graduation, the list includes: Aunt Lany, Cousin Anne, Aunt Lydia, Uncle Mark, Cousin Nina, Mom (who's bring Joe, UGH!), and Dad. They had to get a pass from the care facility so Uncle Mark could come to our graduation (he was transferred from the hospital 2 months ago, into the care facility). I forgot about Uncle Wilson (on my mom's side) and Aunt Pam with their kids, Karen and Sharon, who are flying in from Las Vegas.

"Oh, it's going to be hell," I said to Brittany. She nodded in agreement. In our family, there is no such thing as a happy family gathering. One person has to bring up something unpleasant and ruin the entire event. I sighed. I'm definitely not looking forward to this.

Brittany helped me curl my hair before I slipped into my red one shoulder dress. It might be too dressy for graduation, but I didn't care. I won't admit this out loud, but I want to look nice for Henry.

"Now, you look gorgeous for Henry," Brittany said, after curling the last section of my hair. It's like she can read my mind. It freaks me out. I shook my head and laughed. She left so she could call her boyfriend and see if he was ready yet.

We had to meet at the theater at Beachside University (it was a tradition of ours to hold it at the University) an hour and a half before our graduation is set to start. We had to make sure everything was in order, line up, get ready, possibly rehearse one last time.

I heard a car honk downstairs. I peeked out the window and saw that it was Justin honking. It looked like everyone was in the car. I quickly put on my heels and went downstairs to jump in the car, we were already running a little late.

When I got into the car, I was greeted with 5 hellos. I was squeezed in the back right next to Henry, along with Sarah and Haylie, in a 3 seat backseat. It was extremely awkward being squeezed so close next to Henry, I was practically on his lap.

"Um, hi," I said to him, a little awkwardly. He gave me a slight smile. Sarah and Haylie exchanged a look and laughed.

"You look gorgeous, Courtney," Sarah said. She poked Henry in the ribs. "Doesn't she look gorgeous, Henry?"

I blushed at how Sarah put Henry on the spot like that. He took a long look at me before looking into my eyes.

"Yeah, she does," he said, smiling at me.

I gave him a small smile, but on the inside, I was doing cartwheels and jumping with excitement while giggling like a schoolgirl.

He thinks I look gorgeous!

Prom (Part I)

From left to right: my dress, Haylie's dress, Sarah's dress, Zoey's dress

This is a little embarrassing to admit, but I totally forgot about prom. Somehow, all of the announcements, big signs, and chatter about prom escaped my attention. If it weren't for Brittany jumping on my bed at 7am, I wouldn't have known. Luckily, she had anticipated that I would forget about prom and had bought me a ticket in advance. I have such an awesome sister who assumed correctly that I wanted to go to prom. I was oddly excited for it even though I'm going solo.

"Do you have a dress?" Brittany asked me, taking a bite out of her plain bagel.

"No, I don't! Do you think I can borrow one of the ones you're not wearing?" I asked, sheepishly.

"Sure, sis, let me bring both of them down," she said. Brittany couldn't choose one dress in the store and had figured to buy all three and then try to put together the perfect prom look at home to make the final decision. Again, I was lucky that Brittany hadn't already return the two dresses that she wasn't wearing.

I heard a honk outside and it was my cue to leave. Sarah, Haylie, and I were having a girls' day- getting our hair, makeup, and nails done. Apparently Haylie had the perfect gold heels to go with the short emerald dress I picked out. I grabbed my gold clutch and my dress and headed out the door.

Brittany has been giving me flack for hanging out with Haylie after the Logan incident. But honestly, I don't care anymore. It's just a boy. Boys come and go. Yes, her actions were questionable, but I don't really see the point in throwing away all the years of friendship over one boy. At the end of the day, I still love Haylie and she's my best friend.

Of course, it was an all day process to get ready. I had the whole gorgeous Taylor Swift curls going on, Sarah had her hair up in a bun, and Haylie had a half up, half down hairstyle that resembled something Carrie Underwood would have.

Apparently, we had rented a limo for prom. I didn't know until the driver came to pick us up. Justin, Henry, and Luke were already in the limo. I was surprised that Henry didn't have a date to prom. I know that a bunch of girls would have loved to be his date to prom. Our next stop was Adam's house. I wasn't surprised when he had walked out with Zoey as his date. Everyone looked amazing. The boys in their tuxs and the girls in their dresses.

"Group photo time!" Sarah exclaimed. We groaned and all tried to maneuver in the limo to get into the shot. We got some really cute couple pictures for Adam and Zoey, Sarah and Justin, and for Haylie and Luke. Suddenly, I felt a twinge of sadness that I wasn't going to prom with someone.

"We should get a picture of Courtney and Henry together," Justin said. I laughed and allowed him to take the picture. If anything, I can always lie and say I went with Henry. We arrived at the area where the prom was held right when they were serving the dinner. We had a choice between chicken, beef, or vegetarian. The vegetarian was amazing!

The place was decorated amazingly well. I noticed that the space we had was really roomy and there was a lot of space to mingle and move and dance. We had a balcony if we wanted to get some air. It had such a romantic feel to it. I think the first thing we did after eating was wait in the ridiculously long line for pictures. I think we had every combination possible. The ones that turned out the best was my picture with Brittany. Our parents were going to love them.

I think it was halfway through the prom, I just got claustrophobic. We had all separated- the couples headed to the dance floor to grind on each other (I was never really into grinding). I went outside to get some air. I think I've come to the conclusion that prom is overrated. I mean, the person who was in charge of pulling everything together did a wonderful job, but I wasn't enjoying myself.

"Hey, are you ok?" I turned around and saw that Henry had followed me out.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I told him. "I just thought that I'd be at prom with someone I was dating." I realized how desperate that sounded, but I didn't care.

"You don't need to be dating anyone to have fun at prom," he said to me. "You look beautiful, don't let it go to waste. Come on." He held out his hand. I took it and he lead me inside, where we had started dancing. Right when we got onto the dance floor, the song ended and a slow song came on. Henry pulled me close to him and I wrapped my arms around his neck. Oddly enough, I didn't feel weird slow dancing with Henry. It was weirdly comfortable.

I started to feel nervous. I felt like I had butterflies fluttering around in my stomach. I noticed ridiculously minute details like how his soft brown hair draped over his left eye and how cute his smile was. I couldn't help but notice how close we were. All I could think about was kissing him.

Oh my god, I think I have a crush on Henry.

Hanging Out

Saturday rolled around faster than I expected. I had mixed feelings about going over to Justin's place. On one hand, I was excited to spend some time with Sarah and Justin. On the other hand, I didn't want to see Haylie or Adam. I sighed. Oh well.. I guess we'll see how well today goes.

I went downstairs to tell my mom that I might be spending the night at Justin's. All I found was a note from her saying that she'll be home late. She's probably with Joe. I sighed and left the note where I found it. I couldn't wait for my dad to come home from his business trip in China. He had left a week and a half after he moved out and I'm not sure when he's going to be back.

I took the car keys from Brittany's purse on the living room table. She promised me the car for the weekend and I'm going to make good use of it. I made it to Justin's house early, with a couple of minutes to spare. I sat in the car for a minute, trying to compose myself before I went to face what was inside. I walked up to the front door and rang the doorbell. Sarah answered the door.


"Hey, sweetie!" she greeted me, giving me a hug. "No one else is here yet, but come on in! I'm glad you came!"

"I'm glad I came over too, Sarah," I told her, giving her a tight squeeze. "I missed you." We walked inside and sat down in the living room. I surveyed the choices for today's movie marathon. It consisted of mostly comedies, a couple of action films, and one romantic comedy. I smiled. Any movie out of these selections would be great to watch.

Henry was the next to arrive. I greeted him with a friendly hug and the 4 of us chatted until Adam and Haylie arrived. Adam was the next one to arrive and I was surprised that he brought Zoey along. I shot Henry a look and he looked at me with sympathetic eyes.

I couldn't believe that Adam would have the nerve to bring Zoey along, especially when she must have told him that she had quit her job at Bella because of me. They sat down in the love seat furthest away from Henry and I. The 6 of us sat in awkward silence, waiting for Haylie to arrive. Even though Sarah and Justin weren't in the loop with what happened with Zoey and I, they could sense the tension in the room.

A couple of minutes later, the doorbell rang and Sarah eagerly went to answer it. When Haylie walked in, I was surprised to see her with a guy I've never seen before. The guy stood 6'4 with blond hair and brown eyes, looking like he just got back from the beach. Henry shot me a look and I shook my head, indicating that I didn't know anything about this.

Surprisingly, it wasn't incredibly awkward. The second that Haylie came in with the new guy, it seemed to break the ice. Haylie's new guy is named Lucas, who prefers to be called Luke. He seemed really sweet and he's a senior at our school. He's planning on going to Beachside University, same as Haylie. Apparently, they've been starting to hang out a lot lately.

Then, it was Sarah's turn to bomb Zoey with questions about her and Adam's relationship, which made both of them blush, I'd have to admit that it was kind of cute. Zoey and Adam managed to dodge the questions and get Justin to put in a movie.

I think it was halfway through the romantic comedy (the third movie that we played) that I looked around and noticed that I was surrounded by couples. I saw Sarah sneaking Justin kisses, Adam and Zoey cuddling, and Sarah and Luke holding hands. I felt a little bit claustrophobic and quietly slipped outside on the patio for some air.

It was dark outside and a little bit chilly. I wrapped my fleece blanket around my shoulders. I was surprised to see Henry sitting outside, I had forgotten that he had disappeared during the romantic comedy. I sat down next to him.

"Hey, what are you doing out here?" I asked him. I noticed that he was only wearing a short sleeved T-shirt and hadn't brought a jacket. "You must be freezing!" I moved as close to him as humanly possible and wrapped my blanket around both our shoulders.

"I just wanted to get some air," he said. I didn't want to push the matter, I knew that he was uncomfortable seeing Haylie with Luke. "What are you doing out here?"

"I realized that I was the 7th wheel in there and it got me thinking about Taylor," I admitted, sadly. Tears swelled in my eyes. I had done such a good job of avoiding thinking about Taylor since the break up. Now, it seemed like all the emotions were hitting me at once and the tears started to stream down my face. "I'm sorry." I wiped the tears with the sleeve of my jacket.

Henry held me in his arms and whispered in my ear to let it all out and everything is going to be ok. Even though he kept repeating the same words over and over again, it was comforting to hear them. I guess I fell asleep in Henry's arms and he had taken me home. The next morning, I found myself in my bed and the car in the driveway, but Henry was nowhere to be seen. I smiled to myself and made myself a mental note to do something nice for Henry in return.

Walk Away

I grudgingly pulled myself out of bed this morning. I was not looking forward to school and seeing Adam. But, I had promised Zoey that I would talk to him about their date. I really hoped that he liked Zoey because she's such a sweet girl. She dropped me off at my house last night even though I didn't ask her to and it was completely out of her way. I took a quick shower and went downstairs for breakfast. I was surprised to see Henry there.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him, a little rudely. I'm really not a morning person. I softened the tone of my voice. "I mean, what are you doing here?"

"Your mom let me in. I figured we can grab breakfast on the way to school," he said, smiling. I don't know about any of the other mornings, but this morning, he was awfully chipper. "What do you say, Court? You game?" I really didn't want to go out for breakfast. I wasn't in an extrovert mood this morning.

"No, I don't feel like going out right now," I told him. He looked disappointed. So I said, "Hey, I'll make us some breakfast here. What do you want? Pancakes sound good?" He nodded. I grabbed the pancake mix (yes, I can't cook from scratch, I fail at cooking) and make a two stacks.

"Here you go," I said, setting his stack in front of him. I handed him the maple syrup. I sat down next to him with my stack and started wolfing them down.

"Slow down or you're going to choke," he said, laughing. I looked at him.

"I have to go early so I can talk to Adam," I told him, with my mouth full. Yes, it's a really attractive quality that I have.

"Oh? What do you have to talk to him about?" Henry asked curiously. "Wait, let me guess, you're going to profess your feelings for him." I couldn't tell if he was being sarcastic or if he actually meant it.

"Adam and I are just friends," I told him, firmly. He laughed.

"I was joking," he said, smirking. "Someone's defensive." I smack him on the arm.

"Someone needs to hurry up!" I told him, rolling my eyes. He didn't say anything to me after that. He did start to eat faster though. I smiled to myself.

I practically ran to his truck. I wanted to get this over as soon as possible. Henry was making fun of me the whole ride to school and making kissy noises. I imagined this is what it would be like to have a brother. Boy, was I glad I didn't have a brother. When I got out of his truck, he attempted to follow me, but I shooed him away. I wasn't going to let other people witness the obviously awkwardness between Adam and I. I found Adam at his locker, where he usually was at this time.

"Hey!" I said to him. I was just going to jump right into it. "How was your date the other night?"

"Good," he said, not looking at me.

"Um, well, do you like her?" I asked him.

"Yeah, I do," he said. He seemed annoyed. He turned to look at me. "Listen, I shouldn't be speaking to you now that I'm dating Zoey. I really like her and I don't want things to get awkward in the relationship when I tell her what happened between the two of us. I think it's best if we don't talk to each other." He slammed his locker shut and walked away, leaving me speechless.

Out of the Blue

Taylor has been really nice to me lately. I can tell that he has been trying really hard to get back on my good side. For the last couple days, he drove me to and from school and he cooked me breakfast because he knows I skip it sometimes. He took me on a midnight picnic last night to make up for the both of us fighting on our two month anniversary. He was being really sweet and it was getting hard to stay mad at him.

He was being really patient. He was letting me learning to trust him again at my own pace. He wasn't pushing me or asking me every five minutes if I trusted him yet. I thought it was sweet how he was just giving me my space. He just keeps telling me that he loved me, but he didn't push me to say it back to him.

So, when he dropped me off in front of Bella today, he gave me a sweet kiss goodbye. I almost floated into work because I was so happy. I decided that going with the flow is the best thing ever!

I put my things in my locker and I punched in, starting on the big mess of things that was piling on top of the counter. I looked around, noticing that the store was empty except for me and Zoey.

"So, how was your break, Zoe?" I asked her. "Did you do anything fun?"

"Not really," she said, sadly. "I was working the whole time, but that just equals more money for college." She smiled.

"That's true," I said. Then I had an excellent idea. "Hey! How about we have a girl's day?"

"That sounds really good, actually," she admitted. "Let's do it!"

We were busily chattering and making plans when we heard the front door open. I looked up to greet our customer and I was surprised to see that it was Adam. I must have looked like a deer in headlights because Zoey nudged me in the ribs- hard.

"Have I told you that he's really cute?" she whispered to me. I rolled my eyes.

"Gross," I whispered back to her.

I don't really know why, but I was jealous of the way Zoey was checking Adam out. She was practically drooling over him. She was fixing her hair and fixing her clothes, trying to make sure she looked her best. Adam was too busy looking our jewelry selection to notice us talking about him.

I turned away from Zoey and pushed the jealousy aside. There should be no reason why I'm jealous of Zoey. Adam's not my boyfriend, he's my friend. I have an amazing boyfriend who happens to love me. I was just being overprotective of Adam. Yeah, overprotective.

I continued folding the clothes that were on the counter. I was wondering why Adam was looking at jewelry. Who was he buying jewelry for? I mean, guys don't usually buy jewelry for girls unless they're in a relationship or related. Does he have a girlfriend? Is that who he's buying the jewelry for?

"Hey, Court," Zoey whispered to me.

"Yeah, Zoe?" I whispered.

"Would it be ok, if I asked him out? I know you guys are close friends or something, would it be weird for you if I asked him out?" she asked, softly. "I mean, if it's weird, I won't make a move."

I wanted to tell her that it was not ok. I wanted to tell her that Adam is off limits. I wanted to tell her that I didn't want her to be seeing Adam. I wanted to tell her what happened between Adam and I. But, I was a chicken. Besides, she deserves a good guy after the way Cody treated her.

"No, it's fine," I told her. I faked a smile. "Go ahead."

"Ok, I'm going to see if he needs help," she told me. "Wish me luck!"

"Good luck, Zoe," I told her. I felt really fake. But, I really had no reason to stop Zoey from asking Adam out.

I started putting clothes away, just letting Zoey and Adam have their space while talking at our jewelry section. I tried to ease my mind. Maybe he won't even say yes. Even if he does, what's one date? There's no harm in that.

I was so consumed with thought that I lost track of time. Zoey walked back to me looking really excited. She looked like she was going to explode with happiness.

"He said yes!" she exclaimed softly.

Oh, great!

Bye Bye Bye

I gasped in surprise. I couldn't have heard him right. He couldn't have possibly asked me to choose between him and Adam. I stared at Taylor, speechless.

"Wh-wh-what?" I stuttered. This is a dream. I can wake up now. Time to wake up, Courtney! This isn't happening! I was in denial with what I had just heard.

"You heard me, Court, I want you to choose either me or Adam," Taylor said, firmly. "I don't trust him around you. I think he's going to worm his way back into your life and then try to ruin the relationship that we're trying to have. He ruined our relationship last time, Court, and I want to fall in love with you again. So, please, just cut him out of your life. For me. For our relationship."

I was silent, trying to take in what he was saying.

"Taylor, Adam and I are just friends," I told him, patting his hand. "Baby, I only love him as a friend and nothing more. But with you, I could see myself falling in love with you again. Please don't make me choose." The last part came out as a whisper.

He shook his head no.

"I'm sorry, Court," he said. "You have to choose."

One look at his face and you could tell that he was serious about this. I could see that it pained him as much as it did for me. Instantly, the tears swelled in my eyes. I couldn't believe that he was making me choose. A tear slid down my cheek.

"I.." I said, my voice trailing off.

How was I supposed to choose between my best friend since preschool and my boyfriend who I know I can definitely see a future with? They're both equally important to me. They're both great guys. Adam is a great listener and he knows me inside and out. Dispite the issues we have now, I know we can work past them and move on. Taylor is just a really sweet guy who will drop everything he's doing for me. Even though I'm busy with work and with school, he's so understanding and patient. No matter how you break it down, it comes down to either friendship or possibly love.

"I can't," I whispered, with tears streaming down my face. "You're both important to me." Taylor sighed. He pulled his hand away from mine.

"I'm sorry, Court," he said, sadly. He looked at me. "I can't do this with him in the picture." He stood up.

I couldn't let him go. It broke my heart to watch him leave me. I couldn't let him end our relationship. I cared about him so much. I jumped up and grabbed his arm.

"No, Taylor, don't go," I told him, crying. "I choose you!"

Choices

I stood there for a second, dazed. My mind was going a million miles a minute. Should I go after him and apologize? Should I just let him cool down first? If I go after him, what do I say? Will he even listen to me? He seemed really upset, even though he took my words out of context.

Dammit.

I didn't even think that he would get upset over the fact that I went over to Adam's. He told me that he didn't care about Adam. The nagging voice in my head popped up. But you know what he meant, Court. Remember? He asked you if they were going to stay in your past? You nodded? He meant that he didn't care about Adam as long as he was in your past.

I knew that the nagging voice in my head was right. I knew what I had to do. I really hoped that it was the right decision.

I ran downstairs as fast as I humanly could. I barely caught Taylor as he was pulling out of the driveway.

"No, Taylor, stop!" I yelled, waving my arms wildly in the air. I looked like a complete idiot, but I didn't care as long as I caught his attention. "Please! We need to talk!" I caught my neighbor two doors down, looking at me strangely, out of the corner of my eye. I ignored him and continued shouting at Taylor to stop.

Luckily, his window was open and he heard me yelling at him. Surprisingly, he pulled the car back into my driveway. He parked the car and got out. His face was flushed with anger.

"Oh, I'm so glad you came back, I would have chased you down the street," I joked, trying to lighten the mood. Taylor's face remained unchanged. I wasn't sure how to handle this situation. I've never seen Taylor this angry before. I noticed my neighbor was still staring at us. "Let's go inside and talk, ok, honey?"

He gave me a slight nod and followed me inside the house. I managed to shoot the neighbor a "mind your own business" look before going inside. I sat him down on the couch and took his hand in mine.

"Listen, Taylor, I care about you a lot," I told him, gently. I didn't want to anger him any more than he already was. "I'm sorry about what I said, honey, I didn't mean it the way it came out. What I was trying to say that Adam and I have been friends for such a long time that it's more of a habit than anything else for me to go to him during a time of need. It's not that I can't come to you to talk or that I don't feel comfortable around you, because I do, it's just habit."

Taylor was silent. I couldn't tell what he was thinking. I bit my lip nervously, waiting for him to say something. Anything.

"I want you to choose, Courtney," he told me, breaking his silence. "It has to be me.. or him."

No No No

It was hard coming home with my dad not being there. I know that it wasn't too big of a change since I didn't really see him around when he did live here, but now, it just feels weird knowing that he doesn't live here. I don't think I'm making any sense. I sighed.

Talking with Adam helped a little bit. It was nice to just cry on his shoulder, just like old times. We both know that we still have issues to work out and we're going to work on it little by little. Baby steps until we can find a good place to be in our relationship.

It bothered me a little that he automatically jumped to the conclusion that it was somehow Taylor's fault for my tears. I really just hope that it was his overprotective side showing. I don't want to push the issue and start any more arguments. I'm probably reading too much into it anyways.

Brittany had called Taylor and asked him to come over to make sure I was ok.

"Are you ok, Court?" he asked me after I told him what was going on.

"Yeah," I said. I wasn't ok, but I didn't want to admit it. "There was something I wanted to tell you."

"Sure," he said, smiling encouragingly. "You can tell me anything."

"After my parents told me of the news, I kind of ran away," I told him. "To Adam's." I saw the color drain from his face when I said Adam's name.

"Oh," Taylor said. "What happened?"

"Nothing, I swear!" I said, quickly. "All we did was talk about my parents and I cried on his shoulder a little bit." Taylor looked a little angry at the information.

"You should have came to me," he grumbled. "I'm your boyfriend, not him."

"I know you're my boyfriend, Taylor," I told him, trying to keep my tone even-tempered. "But, Adam is my friend. He's been my friend all of this time and I can go to him for anything." Taylor looked even angrier from hearing what I said.

"You can go to me for anything!" he told me, trying not to yell. Him practically yelling at me sparked my anger.

"I know that!" I said, angrily. "I don't know, Taylor, I'm just more comfortable talking to Adam." I stopped after I realized what I had said. It came out completely wrong.

"No, no, no," I said, as I tried to backtrack. "What I mean is-"

"Why don't you make him your boyfriend then?" Taylor said, cutting me off. He stormed off and slammed my bedroom door behind him.

Why

I don't know how long we stood at the doorway, but it felt like an eternity. The tears flowed like water. My tears soaked through the T-shirt Adam was wearing. I couldn't control the sobs that escaped my mouth. As hard as I tried, I couldn't stop myself from looking like a fool. I finally regained some composure and took a couple deep breaths. I sniffled and pulled myself away.

"I'm sorry," I told him, still sniffling. He pulled me into a hug and kissed my forehead.

"Don't be sorry," he said, softly. "I'm always here for you, Court."

I attempted a smile, but I couldn't muster it. He pulled me gently into the house and sat me down in the living room. He immediately brought me a cup of my favorite green tea to help calm me down. I took a small sip and I couldn't help but start to relax. The aroma of the tea was extremely calm and soothing.

"Feeling better?" he asked me, worriedly.

"The tea helped, thanks," I said.

"Good, I'm glad," he said.

I was surprised to find that it wasn't awkward to talk to Adam. It brought me hope that we could go back to normal as friends.

Adam cleared his throat.

"What happened, Court?" he asked me. He began to interrogate me.

"Was it Taylor? Did he hurt you? Did you find him with another girl? Whatever it is, I'll kill him if he hurt you, Court." His voice laced with anger. I shook my head no. I almost burst out laughing at how he assumed that it was Taylor. He was acting like his old overprotective self again.

"No, it wasn't Taylor," I told him. I took a deep breath. "My parents are separating." He pulled me into his arms.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Court," he said, sympathetically. "I know that everyone is going to tell you this, but, it'll be ok. Really. I'm sure that your parents will be able to work everything out."

"I hope so," I told him. He held me in his arms in silence. I was emotionally drained and rested my head on him. We had a nice moment going on until Adam ruined it with a question I didn't want to hear.

"Why didn't you go to Taylor's?" he asked me.

"I don't know, Adam," I whispered, softly. "I don't know."

Need You Now

I couldn't tell you where my parent's marriage went wrong. I didn't see any warning signs. There weren't any arguments, there weren't any physical altercations, there wasn't any abuse (emotional or physical). I couldn't understand why my dad was moving out of the house. Everything seemed fine yesterday, everything seemed fine this morning. I thought that we were a perfectly happy family, but I guess I was wrong.

I was too scared to ask them what went wrong. I didn't think it was my place to ask. I was only their daughter. I'm not even an adult. Even knowing what did go wrong, I knew that I couldn't fix it. It was their problems and I shouldn't get involved with the already fragile situation.

Brittany and I looked at each other. She looked how I felt. I felt completely empty inside, like a part of me had died. I took another look at my sister. Her face was completely white and tears were forming in her eyes. I stood up and looked my dad right in the eye.

"I got into BU," I told him. The words hung in the air. There was silence that I've never encountered. I left without saying another word.

I heard Brittany shouting after me, but I ignored her cries. I knew I had to get out of here. I had to get out of the house. I had to leave and forget everything that happened.

I drove around town aimlessly, paying no attention to where I was going.

I blamed myself for my parents' separation. If I had been a better student, this wouldn't have happened. If I had been more outgoing, this wouldn't have happened. If I wasn't so lazy or ungrateful, this wouldn't have happened. If I had been a better daughter, this wouldn't have happened.

I was surprised with where I had ended up, in the driveway of Adam's house. I didn't care that we weren't exactly speaking, I needed my best friend.

I rang his doorbell and held my breath. He had every right to turn me away. I knew that I had to try. He was always there for me when things got bad. He was the person I went to when things go wrong. He was the only person who can make me feel better.

It felt like an eternity had passed before Adam opened the door. At this point, I couldn't hold my tears in anymore. Adam did what Adam did best. He held me in his arms as I cried, whispering into my ear that everything will be alright.

Make You Feel Better

My jaw dropped. I was in denial. I couldn't believe it. Zoey and Cody? No way. I just couldn't picture them together. I mean, she's gorgeous and could have any guy she wanted, but.. he's just so sketchy. He was totally inappropriate for canoodling with Haylie in the stockroom where Zoey could see or hear them. Not knowing how to respond, I stayed silent. Zoey looked at me oddly.

"Sorry, I'm still in shock," I told her, apologetically. "It's just weird that you were with someone like him."

"He didn't use to be like that," Zoey said sadly. "I mean, we were together for over 3 years. We were high school sweethearts and I don't know what happened. I thought everything was going well and that everything was fine. He showered me with attention and was just incredibly sweet. I mean, he came here to work with me in November so we could spend a little bit more time together. I honestly thought that we would get married one day."

"What happened?" I asked her. A tear rolled down her cheek and I handed her a tissue. She smiled and took it.

"I don't know," she told me. "I think it was the day of your orientation when he texted me to tell me that he wanted to see other people. I still don't know why he decided to break it off. I know I've been busy with school and with work and everything, but I tried to put an equal amount of effort into our relationship." She sniffled.

"Oh, hun," I told her, sympathetically. "It'll be ok. Totally overused, but, there are plenty of fish in the sea. You're going to find someone better than Cody. He doesn't deserve you."

"It just hurts right now," she admitted. "I can't believe that he had sex in the stockroom of where we both worked with a girl he barely met. Did he even consider how I would feel? How I would react? Obviously not. I'm glad I yelled at him. He needed to know what he did was not ok. I think that he realized that we're both 19 years old and in college. He's a guy and he's in a fraternity. I wouldn't be surprised if the reason why he broke up with me is because he saw all the freedom his brothers have because they aren't in a relationship. He just wants to screw random chicks at parties, in my opinion."

"Well, do you want to report him to Jasmine?" I asked her. "He would get fired for sure. You won't have to see him around every time you come into work and you won't have to feel awkward here at work."

"I can't do that," Zoey said, her voice sad again. "Even though he broke my heart, I still love him."

"I understand," I told her. And I really did, I felt the exact same way about Taylor when he had broken up with me. It took me a very long time to get over the betrayal and learn to trust a guy again. Then came Logan, which wasn't really a big improvement, but I had trusted him and he had broken my trust. Now, I trust Taylor, but I'm still keeping an eye on him.

"We learn from our mistakes and experiences," I told her. "This is just a bump in the road, everything will be ok."

"I know, but I still want to be friends with him even though he broke my heart and I think I need to be the bigger person and reach out to him," she said. sighing. "I'm going to go to the restroom and freshen up. Thanks, Court, for trying to make me feel better." Zoey left me alone at the front of the store.

I thought about what she said and I took out my phone.

Adam, we need to talk.

And I pressed send.

Come Back to Me

I laid in my bed reading a book for English when I heard a tapping noise outside of my window. I walked across the room and opened my curtains, curious to see where the noise was coming from. I almost had a heart attack when I saw there was someone outside my window, but then I realized that it was Adam. My panic turned into confusion. Why was he here and why was he on my roof when he could use the front door? I opened my window to let him in.

"Why are you here?" I asked him.

"I came for you, Court," he said, softly. "I love you."

"Adam, we went over this," I told him, sternly. "I'm not in love with you."

"Stop denying our connection," he said. "We're perfect together."

I opened my mouth to protest, but I couldn't get a word out. Adam had gently pressed his lips onto mine. All of my thoughts disappeared. All I could think about was how great of a kisser he was and how soft his lips were. I could feel the chemistry between us. It didn't take me long to kiss him back and for the kiss to move from soft and sweet to hot and heavy. I couldn't fight the desire anymore.

"This is wrong," I told him breathlessly as I was unbuttoning his shirt. He lifted me up and carried me to my bed.

"Then why does it feel so good?" he smirked as he pulled my pants down. He threw them all the way across the room, leaving me in my thong. I straddled him and pulled off his belt when I heard someone shout my name. I looked up and saw Taylor standing by the door. I quickly jumped off of Adam and put on my pants.

"Taylor, this isn't what it looks like," I told him, quickly.

"Well, what does it look like, Court?" Taylor demanded. "It looked like you were going to sleep with him."

Taylor looked so angry. He looked like he was going to punch the wall or punch Adam. I instantly felt guilty. I don't know what would possess me to jump in bed with Adam. I understand the last time, I was drunk, I probably wasn't thinking clearly. But, I had no excuse this time. I didn't know what to say to apologize to Taylor, I didn't know what to say to make things better. My heart was breaking. I hate that I hurt him.

"I don't know what to say," I said, sadly.

"Whatever, Court, do whatever you want," he told me. "I'm leaving." He walked out the door.

"Taylor, no!" I shouted. "I love you!"

I jolted up, gasping for breath. I looked around in my room and fell back onto my pillows in relief. It was all just a dream, none of that happened. What sucks is that I have all day to analyze my dream and now I'm going to be obsessing over it.

I rolled over and looked at my clock. It read 6:30. I groaned, knowing that I wouldn't be able to go back to sleep. I pulled the covers over my head and tried to make sense of my dream.

Break the Ice

Today, work went much better than last time. Zoey wasn't here, thank goodness. I was surprised to see a guy working the register today. He was extremely cute with his blond hair and blue eyes. He had a body of a surfer and he wasn't afraid to show off in his muscular arms in his T-shirt. I was curious as to why he would work at a women's clothing store. I went up to him, ignoring the butterflies I had in my stomach, and introduced myself.

"Hi, I'm Courtney," I said, smiling.

"Hey, I'm Cody," he said, showing off his perfect smile. I almost swooned. Stop it, Court. You have a boyfriend. A very sweet, adorable, caring, hot boyfriend. Stop drooling over Cody.

"Hey Courtney!" I heard this super perky voice said. Oh no, why do we always get scheduled together? I see Haylie walking up to us. "Oh, hey, Cody." She flashed Cody the world's biggest smile. You can tell she's smitten with him too. I'm glad that we both had boyfriends or else we'd be fighting over him.

"Yeah, hey, Haylie," I said, bringing my attention back to Cody. "So, Cody, how long have you worked here?"

"Since November," he said. "I was originally hired as a seasonal employee."

"Oh Cody, tell Court what you told me about your recent trip to Las Vegas," Haylie said, almost gushing. I think she was trying to make me jealous that she had already talked to Cody before me. I started folding some clothes that were left on the counter so I could turn away from Haylie and roll my eyes.

"I was in Las Vegas over the intersession at Beachside University and I tried out to go on this new game show," he told me. I nodded to let him know I was listening. "I got on and won 200 bucks."

"That's pretty cool," I said, while stacking up some jeans. "I'm going to go put some things away."

I left Haylie alone to talk to Cody. I know that there's no competition for him, but I felt like she was making it a competition. I don't want anything to do with her pettiness.

I was busily trying to figure out where the jeans went when I heard the door jingle, signalling that we had a customer. I looked up and saw Adam walk into the store. Needless to say that I was a little bit shocked. I walked up to him.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him. He, too, looked a little shocked to see me here.

"I'm here to pick up Haylie," Adam said, a little confused. "What are you doing here?"

"I work here," I said, pointing to my name tag. I mentally sighed.

All I wanted to do was tell him how much I missed him. I missed how he was there for me no matter what. I missed all the time we spent together hanging out after school. I missed goofing around with him. I missed my best friend. But, I couldn't get the words out. I missed my Adam.

"Ok, I'm ready, Adam," Haylie said. I jumped 3 feet in the air. She had snuck up behind us.

"I'm parked right outside," he told her. She waved bye to Cody and I before leaving the store.

I knew that it would be awhile before I could muster up the courage to tell him how I really felt. Before I could weigh the pros and cons, my mouth did the talking for me.

"I miss you, Adam," I blurted out.

I was scared of his reaction. All I wanted was for us to be friends again- for all the awkwardness to disappear. I just wanted everything to go back to the way things were. I just wanted him to tell me that everything was ok between us.

"I miss you too, Court," he said.

And he walked out.

Crazy Beautiful

Sarah and Justin had invited me out to dinner tonight at our burger joint. I was slightly confused why we were going out to dinner. Sarah and Justin lived really busy lives and I respected that by giving them their space. I was curious why I was invited and told them I'd be there at 7.

I arrived at the burger joint a couple of minutes before 7. Justin and Sarah were already there and they had gotten us the big booth. I waved at them and went over. Sarah got up to give me a hug.

"Hey, guys," I said, grinning. "This is a surprise, what's the occasion?"

"I want to wait until everyone comes before I say anything," Sarah said. I didn't think I heard her correctly, but I thought I heard her say everyone.

"Everyone?" I asked her, questioningly. "Who's everyone?"

"Henry, Adam, and Haylie," Justin said. "Who else could everyone be?"

My face froze when she said Haylie. It must have been noticeable because Sarah started to look a little worried.

"Are you ok, Court?" Sarah asked me. "You look a little pale."

"No, I'm fine," I lied. "I didn't know that everyone else was coming."

I started to feel a little nauseous. I wanted to leave, but I knew that whatever news Sarah and Justin had must have been big if they had invited all of us out. I didn't want to put my personal problems ahead of my friendship with them, so I stayed.

I played catch up with Sarah and Justin for a couple of minutes when Henry and Adam arrived. I waved at Henry and civilly said hello to Adam. He gave me a cold nod in response. I sighed softly. Things were going to be weird between us for awhile. Sarah shot me a confused look and I smiled weakly. I turned to Henry and we chatted about the Superbowl while we waited for Haylie.

Haylie arrived 20 minutes late in the arms of Logan. They were all over each other, all lovey-dovey with one another. It make me want to throw up. I hated seeing them together. I can't really explain it. I didn't want Logan for myself, but I hated seeing him together with Haylie. I looked at Henry and the look on his face was unforgettable. He looked completely heartbroken seeing Haylie with someone else.

Sarah shot me a very confused look. She had no idea that Haylie was with Logan. The last thing she heard was that Logan and I were together. I hadn't gotten around to telling her the drama that had occurred or that Logan and I had broken up. I instantly felt guilty. I needed to do a better job communicating with Sarah.

"Haylie, I didn't know you were bringing a date," Sarah said. She looked at the booth. "We're going to have to try to squeeze him in."

"Oh, he's not staying," Haylie said. She completely ignored my presence. I was glad that we weren't speaking and were just pretending that the other didn't exist. Logan looked uncomfortable and avoided looking at me like I was Medusa and was going to turn him into stone. "He just wanted to get something to eat, right, babe?"

"Yeah," Logan said. He gave her a kiss and I swear he grabbed her butt before leaving. Haylie took a seat next to Adam.

"Since we're all here," Justin said. "Sarah and I have an announcement to make."

"We're engaged!" Sarah blurted out, giggling hysterically. We all clamored in excitement and congratulated them.

"When's the wedding?" I asked her.

"In July," she said, grinning. We were all too busy congratulating and questioning Justin and Sarah to notice Haylie had slipped out.

The Truth

We got back to Beachside at around midnight. We stopped by a local diner to get something to eat. I had an insane craving for some french fries and decided to order a bacon burger with fries. Taylor ordered a burger and said that he wasn't too hungry, but he kept swiping fries off my plate. I kicked him lightly under the table.

"Hey!" he said, grinning. He rubbed his shin, playfully. "You're mean."

"Don't take my fries," I said, laughing.

He continued to take fries off my plate. We finished our burgers and paid the bill. It was a five minute ride from the diner to my house. We were there in no time. I got off of his bike and stared at him in amazement. I can't believe I broke up with him. He makes me feel so comfortable around him, it's almost natural. He caught me staring at him and smiled. He got off his bike and took his helmet off.

"Let me walk you to the door," he said. He took my hand and walked me to the door. "I'd really like it if we continued this."

"I'd really like it if we continued this too," I said. He pulled me in for a kiss.

"I'll call you," he said, smiling. "Good night."

"Good night, Taylor," I said, giving him another kiss. I watched him walk back to his bike and ride off. I sighed, happily.

I went inside and was surprised to see Adam sitting in my living room. I didn't see his car in the driveway.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him. I noticed that he had a dozen roses next to him.

"I wanted to apologize for my behavior, Court," he said. He looked extremely nervous and spoke extremely fast, I almost didn't understand him. "I'm sorry that I didn't tell you the truth about Haylie and Logan. It's just that I didn't know how to tell you and I panicked, the whole drugs thing was the first thing that popped into my mind. I'm sorry that I dragged it out for so long and I didn't tell you the truth. I knew that when you confronted Haylie that I should have said something, but I didn't. I didn't want you to be angry with me, but I messed that up. I just wanted to say I was sorry, Court."

I didn't know what to say. I was less irritated with him after the weekend with Taylor.

"And the Taylor thing?" I asked him.

"I did pay that girl to kiss him," he admitted. "I really didn't trust him around you. He wasn't good enough for you, Court. I wanted you to see that."

I also didn't know what to say to that. It irritated me that he butted into something that didn't involve him. It was none of his business whether or not Taylor was good enough for me.

"Huh," I said.

"So, where were you?" he asked me. "I came here yesterday, but no one was home."

"I've been in San Diego," I said. I paused. "With Taylor."

I could see his expression had changed. He looked angry.

"What the hell were you thinking, Court?" he yelled. "What kind of an idiot goes with their ex-boyfriend to a city that's 5 hours away? Are you out of your mind? He stalked you, remember? What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Well, Adam, I had a good time," I said, calmly. "You might not agree with my decisions, but it's my decisions to make. Not yours, mine. We had a good time and we're going to be hanging out. It might evolve to something more, but it's too early to jump the gun."

"What about me, Court?" he asked me, with slightly demanding tone. "I thought you were going to give me a chance!"

"I'm sorry, Adam," I told him, sadly. "I really don't have any feelings for you. I don't want to force something that isn't there. Maybe in the future, I might have feelings for you. But in the present, I really don't. I see you as my best friend and nothing more."

"Well, fine!" he yelled. He threw the flowers at me. "I brought those for you." He stormed out of my house, slamming the door behind him.

Beat It

The next few days passed without any incident. It was really awkward seeing Logan in class, but he had enough sense to sit in the front of the class and not his usual seat besides me. The entire school knew that he had cheated on me and that I had broken up with him. Today, he tried to talk to me as I walked out of class.

"Court, can I talk to you?" Logan asked, trying to catch up to me. I quickened my pace. He grabbed my arm and I turned around.

"Don't you dare touch me, Logan!" I yelled, yanking my arm away. I caught the attention of a few students. They were eagerly waiting to see what would happen next. "We have nothing to talk about. I want you to stay away from me." I quickly walked away and tried to ignore the stares.

Brittany caught up to me after my next class and was nagging at me to talk to Adam.

"If you don't do it soon, you're going to explode and make the situation worse," she told me.

I knew that she was right, but I didn't want to confront him. I was done with confrontations. I had confronted Adam and I had confronted Logan (twice). I was just tired and emotionally drained.

Strangely enough, I didn't miss Logan at all. Maybe I was still in shock. I told him that I loved him for the short time we've been together. But, if I had truly loved him, shouldn't I be extremely depressed, whining, crying, spreading rumors about Haylie- having the exact same reaction that Farrah did when Taylor cheated on her? Then, it hit me. I was never truly in love with Logan in the first place.

I still think about Farrah from time to time. I wondered how she was. I wondered if she was over the whole Taylor incident. I wondered how long it took for her to get over it. I never thought about how she felt, I had only thought about being with Taylor. I couldn't believe how selfish I was. I wonder if I could ever forgive Haylie for what she's done.

I made my way to the cafeteria and got a sandwich to eat. I walked out to the quad and found an empty bench. I took out my physiology book and started to read about neurons. I stopped reading when I noticed a shadow standing besides me. I looked up and saw Haylie.

"Court, can we talk?" she asked me. I could see the hurt in her eyes. I could see that she looked fatigued and wasn't eating well. Seeing her standing besides me made me incredibly angry.

"No," I told her. "Like I told Logan, we have nothing to talk about."

Most people would have gotten the hint, but not Haylie. She came and sat down next to me on the bench.

"Please, Court," she pleaded. "I just want to explain." I jumped up from my seat.

"Oh, you want to explain?" I shouted, angrily. "You want to explain why you slept with my boyfriend? You want to explain why you're an sorry excuse for a friend? You want to explain why you're a backstabbing, two-faced whore?"

She slapped me hard across the face. I looked at her, my mouth hanging wide open, in shock. I was ready to jump her when Adam squeezed between us and pulled me away.

"No, she slapped me!" I shouted at him. "What are you doing?"

"Are you crazy?" he asked me. "If I didn't stop you, you'd get suspended. She's not worth it, Court."

"Why did you lie to me about Haylie?" I asked him, angrily. "I can handle the truth, Adam, I'm not some child that you have to lie to! You should have told me in the first place!"

"I-" he started to say.

"I'm starting to think Taylor was right about you paying that girl to make it look like he was cheating on me," I cut him off. "Just leave me alone, Adam." I stormed off.

This Love

*Sorry this is late, I could have sworn it posted! Again, sorry for the delay*

It was as if time had froze. I didn't know what to make of the situation. My best friend told me that he loved me and not in the "I love you, buddy" way, but in the romantic "I love you" way. He had put me on the spot. I sat there, trying to figure out if I felt the same way about him- or could I even feel the same way about him.

We've known each other since preschool and we know everything about each other. I feel that one of the best parts of a relationship is the "honeymoon stage" where they find out everything about each other and they think the other one's quirks are adorable. But with Adam and I, we know what irritates the other. We know all about each other's past (well, at least, I do now) and we've hung out so many times over the years. We'll be like an old married couple.

I tried to picture us together- going out to dinner, seeing a movie, taking a walk around the park near my house, talking for hours on end until we fell asleep on each other. I can see that happening, only because we've done all of those things together.

What if I say yes and we end up breaking up? I'll lose him forever. But, on the other side of the coin, if I say no, he could decide that he never wants to speak to me again and I'll lose him forever. I don't think I could lose Adam.

"Court," he whispered, softly. It broke me out of my train of thought. "What are you thinking?"

He looked at me, his eyes pleading. I took a deep breath, I knew what I was going to do. I looked into his eyes and tried to make this as clear as possible.

"Adam listen, we've been friends for a long time and I love you dearly," I said. "But really, Adam, I don't love you romatically. I'm sorry."

He looked as if his heart was broken into a million pieces.

"I understand," he said.

"You didn't let me finish," I told him. "I'm willing to give us a try if we use baby steps and maybe one day I'll fall in love with you."

He lit up like a little boy on his birthday.

"Court, you really don't know how happy you've made me," he said, grinning from ear to ear. I smiled.

Let's hope I made the right decision- for both our sakes.