Saturday, October 31, 2009


Tonight was the Halloween get-together. The group and I had decided to have a Saw marathon because Saw XI just came out into theaters. Of course, Haylie and I were there before everyone else all dressed up and ready to get to work. We had poured the chips, set the candy set up, and put drinks in the fridge. The doorbell rang. I opened the door.

"Trick or treat!" the bunch of kids yelled. I happily gave them a handful of candy each. It was cute seeing the kids dressed up as ghosts, zombies, and witches. There was even a little girl dressed up as a princess. It was adorable. I turned to put the candy bowl down, so I could shut the door.

"Do I get any candy?" I turned around. Logan was standing beside me wearing a convicted felon black and white costume.

"You look quite sexy as a cop," he said, giving me a kiss. "How do I look?" He turned around, striking some poses. I laughed.

"You'd make a cute inmate," I said, laughing. "You had some help, didn't you?" He smiled and put a finger to his lips.

"Shh, it's a secret," he said.

"Wanna help me pass out candy to the kids while we wait for the others to get here?" I asked him.

"What happens if I don't?" he asked me. He pulled me closer. "Are you a dirty cop?"

"That's for you to find out," I said, pulling him into a kiss.

"Whoa, you two!" I heard Haylie exclaim. We turned to look at her.

"The door is open. No PDA in front of the little kids!" She said, laughing. Logan and I broke apart and laughed.

Eventually, the rest of the gang got here. Justin, Henry, and Adam were dressed as police officers. We all plopped down on the sofas in the living room. It was cute seeing Justin and Sarah in their costumes. They really did make a perfect couple. Justin was a little freaked out about the scare. Not because that she might have been pregnant, but the fact that she didn't tell him about it. They had such an open and honest relationship that it blows my mind.

I cuddled with Logan, and snuck kisses to him whenever I thought no one was looking. I really like where this is going. I really like him, even though we haven't made it official yet, I know that it's in our cards. I managed to sneak off into the kitchen with him when we were low on soda.

"Finally, we're alone," I said. I pulled him in for a kiss.

"You'd make a really sexy cop," he whispered into my ear. He started kissing my neck and I let out a little moan. That was my weakness.

"Where are you guys?" Adam shouted. "We're getting to the good part!"

I sighed. I hate being interrupted. I'm kinda glad that Adam interrupted us. Who knows where the kisses on the neck would have gone? I really don't want to ruin what we have by having sex too early. I don't want to make the same mistake as before. I kissed Logan on the cheek and grabbed the 2-Liter out of the fridge. He followed me into the living room.

The doorbell rang and we all jumped. We all laughed at our silliness. Except for Adam, who seemed to be frowning for some reason. He's so weird. I think he's a little grumpy because he wanted to have a "I know what you did" marathon.

"I got this one, guys," Haylie said. She left to answer the door. The rest of us were back to being engrossed in the movie. The movie ended and I realized that Haylie wasn't back yet.

"Where is she?" Logan asked me.

"I'll go check the house for her," I said. "You guys start the second movie, I'll be back."

"Do you want me to go with you?" he asked me, grabbing my hand. I shook my head and he let go. I didn't want to look like I was scared. I checked the kitchen and every room downstairs and I didn't see Haylie. I went upstairs and checked each room, one by one, but they were all empty. I reached the last room, her bedroom, and opened the door.

"Haylie!" I shouted in surprise. She looked at me in surprise and pushed the guy who was on top of her off. He had his shirt off. I realized who it was. "Steve?" I looked at Haylie who looked ashamed.

"Thanks, Courtney," he grumbled. Haylie was frantically putting her costume back on.

"This wasn't what it looks like, Court," she said, quickly. "We got back together and I didn't know how to tell you and it's complicated!"

"He broke your arm!" I cried out.

"It was an accident!" she defended him.

"I can't believe you got back together with him!" I exclaimed. "How stupid can you be?"

"I love him, Court," she said. She was practically pleading with me to accept her decision.

"Yeah? Well, it's your life to screw up," I spat out. I left her and Steve standing there with their jaws dropped in awe.

I have never been this upset with Haylie in my life.

Friday, October 30, 2009

Date Night

Tonight I was my first official date with Logan. He had suggested that we should go out on an actual date before hanging out at the Halloween "party" tomorrow. Of course, Friday nights are the nights to go out on a date. He wanted to be old fashioned and take me to dinner and a movie. I found him to be extremely adorable when he had suggested a dinner and a movie.

I didn't want to get too dressed up for the date. I thought it would be weird to get dressed up for the dinner and be all "dolled up" for the movie afterwards. I had decided on this ruby red silk top and black skinny jeans. I went with a natural look with my makeup. I looked dressed up, but not too dressed up.

The doorbell rang. I heard Brittany going downstairs and opening the door. I heard footsteps up the stairs.

"Hey, you dressed?" Brittany joked after she had knocked on my door a couple of times.

"Haha, very funny," I said. sarcastically. She came in. She was all dressed up too. "Are you going out too?"

"Yeah, I'm going to see a movie with Zack," she said. Zack was her quarterback boyfriend. He is loaded. LOADED. He spoils Brittany. He buys her clothes, he buys her jewelry, he buys her food, he pays for her meals, he is loaded! He truly does love her though. Brittany really loves him too.

"Ok, cool," I said.

"Don't keep him waiting," she said, smiling. I laughed. Even though she and her friends used to torture me at school (and sometimes still do), Brittany still loves me.

"Don't get pregnant!" I joked, as she left the room. She knew I was serious and I wanted her to be careful. I went downstairs.

"You look amazing," he said, kissing me on the cheek.

"You don't look so bad yourself," I said, laughing. I could see Brittany peeking at the top of the stairs. "I see you, Brit."

"No good action anyways," she joked. "Fine. I'll go make myself look prettier." She went back to her room. I laughed.

"Ready to go?" he asked. I nodded and grabbed my clutch. He drove us to a casual restaurant, there weren't too many fancy restaurants in Beachside. The restaurant was called The Boiling Lobster. Their food was delicious.

We got seated right away. We ended up geting a table outside, which was nice. I had ordered the fried crab basket with Cajun fries and he had ordered the fried catfish with Cajun fries. Cajun fries are the best! They are so delicious because of the spicy kick!

"So, what costume are you wearing tomorrow?" I asked him.

"I have to wear a costume?" He asked. "No one said anything about a costume!" I laughed.

"It's Halloween, Logan!" I said, smiling. "I can quote some Mean Girls but I'll choose not to."

"How about, you tell me what you're going to be?" he said, laughing. The waitress brought us our food.

"It's a surprise," I said, winking.

"A girl with mystery," he said. "I like that." I laughed. We finished our food and went to the drive in theater. He had bought the tickets to Paranormal Activity. I had told him to choose the movie. I guess he chose a scary movie so I could hide in his arms and turn to him for comfort. He doesn't know that I've seen this already. He found a spot and turned off the car.

"Thank you for taking me out tonight," I said, smiling.

"It was my pleasure," he said, grinning. He was staring at me.

"What?" I asked him, suddenly self-conscious. "Is there something on my teeth?" He laughed.

"No, there's nothing on your teeth," he said. "You're just so beautiful." With that, he kissed me. It was a sweet kiss. I found myself losing myself in the kiss. I don't know how long we were kissing, but it felt like it lasted forever. It was perfect.

"Wow," I said when we broke away.

"Yeah, wow," he said, breathlessly.

We made out during the entire movie in the back seat. It didn't go any further than that. Logan drove me home and walked me to the front porch.

"I had a really good time tonight," I said, kissing him.

"I had a really good time too," he said, smiling.

"I'll see you tomorrow, then?" I said.

"Yes, you definitely will," he said. He gave me a kiss goodnight and I waved to him as he drove off into the starry night.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

A Little Peeved

It had been a few weeks since the pregnancy scare. Logan and I had hung out a couple of times but nothing happened. He didn't make a move on me. Call me old fashioned but I like it when the guy makes the first move.

Halloween was around the corner (Saturday isn't too far away!!). I still had to buy a costume to wear. I was thinking of buying a cop costume or maybe a schoolgirl costume. I needed something to get Logan to make a move. The costume shop was filled with people trying to find a costume for Halloween. There were a bunch of angry parents standing in line to pay for their kids' costumes.

"How about this one?" Haylie asked. She was holding up a "Queen Bee" costume. I laughed.

"I think Brittany has that one actually," I said. "I think I'll go try on the cop and the schoolgirl one."

"Ok, I'll grab the correctional one too," she said, while carrying three other costumes.

We were planning on wearing costumes with the same theme. We were both into being sexy cops for Halloween. We went into the dressing room and I tried on the schoolgirl costume first. It was too small on me. I needed the next size up, but they didn't have any more mediums left. I was lucky to have gotten this small one. I think it was a return because it was missing the tie. I hate it when you find costumes that are missing some of its pieces.

I tried on the cop costume and surprisingly, it fit perfectly. I loved it. I thought I looked incredibly sexy in it.

"Hey, does yours fit?" I heard Sarah shout. She had grabbed a bunch of costumes and has been in the fitting room for the last 20 minutes while we had decided on ours.

"Yeah!" both Haylie and I shouted.

We decided that I would be the sexy police officer, that Haylie would be the sexy correctional officer, and that Sarah would be the sexy border patrol officer. I love having girlfriends to dress up with!

We were going to have a small get-together at Haylie's house. It's going to be the group and Logan. We're planning on watching scary movies all night long (since Halloween falls on a Saturday this year) and passing out candy to the little trick-or-treaters. I love seeing little kids in their costumes!

The three of us got in the incredibly long line and started to chat about how much fun Saturday will be. I saw someone that looked familiar. It can't be. It was Taylor. I tried to hide myself behind Haylie, but it was too late, he had spotted me. Like the idiot he was, he came walking over to us.

"Hey, stranger," he said, grinning. "Haylie. Sarah." He nodded to them.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him.

"Same thing you're doing," he said. He took a look at our costumes. "Shopping for a costume. Nice."

"What do you want, Taylor?" I asked him, coldly.

"Nothing, just wanted to say hi," he said. He smirked. "Do you remember the costume you wore for me? It drove me wild. You had on this lingerie-"

I handed Haylie my costume and pulled Taylor away from the girls. He waved bye to Haylie and Sarah.

"What do you think you're doing?" I spat out. "Are you trying to embarrass me?"

"No," he said innocently. "I just wanted to know if you remembered the costume you wore for me when we first made love."

"We weren't making love," I said. "If we did, you wouldn't have cheated on me!"

"I told you that she had kissed me!" he exclaimed. "We were working on our Spanish project."

"Yeah, whatever," I said, rolling my eyes. "Whatever helps you sleep at night."

"I loved you, Court," he said, sincerely. He looked hurt. "I miss you."

"Yeah? Well, you had your chance," I said, sadly. "Too late now." I walked away from him.

"You'll change your mind!" he shouted after me. "You'll see!"

I couldn't help but worry about what he had up his sleeves.

Monday, October 26, 2009

It's a ...

It was the crack of dawn when I had arrived at Sarah's house with Haylie and the pregnancy test. I couldn't believe that this was happening. I couldn't believe that Sarah could be pregnant. I mean, she's so young, she has her whole future ahead of her.

The three of us sat on her bed in silence. We were worried what the test would say. What if it came out positive? What would Sarah do? Would she keep the baby? Would she have an abortion? Would she give it up for adoption? How would she tell Justin?

"Have you thrown up since the dance?" Haylie asked Sarah suddenly. Sarah shook her head.

"No, that was the only time," She replied. "I didn't realize that my period was more than two weeks late."

"Well, sweetie, just go in when you're ready," I said. Sarah sighed.

"I'm ready," she said. "I really have to pee anyways." We laughed with her. We knew that she was trying to lighten the mood. This couldn't be easy on her. I'm sure she had a million of what-ifs floating in her mind. She came out two minutes later.

"How long do we have to wait?" Haylie asked.

"It says that we have to wait 3 minutes," I said. We sat around in a circle on the ground with the test in the middle. It was the longest three minutes of my life.

"What are you going to do, sweetie, if you are?" Haylie asked.

"I don't know," Sarah said. "I'd have to talk to Justin first. I have a complicated stand on abortion and I'm not sure what the future would hold if I had the baby."

She did have a really complicated stand on abortion. She believed that women do have the right to have an abortion, but she didn't know if she could personally go through with something like that. She believe that it was murdering a child, but women need to have the right to decide- it's their body. But I don't think that she could ever have an abortion. She would feel guilty for the rest of her life.

"I mean, people at school will be talking about me behind my back," she continued. "They'll say horrible things about me. They'll spread rumors. What if Justin leaves me because of this?"

"Honey, you're being ridiculous," I said. "You and Justin have been together so long that he can't possibly leave you."

"He loves you!" Haylie exclaims. "You know that!"

"I know," Sarah said. "Sometimes I think that the only reason that we're still together is because it's easy. We love each other too much to break up. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing."

We didn't know what to say to that. It was a sad thought to have. Sarah and Justin have been the perfect couple for years and it's difficult for me to see that they're just human beings. It's hard for me to see that even their relationship has problems and cracks. We were silent after that.

Beep. Beep. Beep.

It was the alarm that I had set. The three minutes were up. Sarah picked up the test and stared at it.

"One line means you're not pregnant and two means that you are," I said, reading the box.

"What does it say?" Haylie asked. We were both bracing ourselves because we knew there was a chance that she could be pregnant.

"Guys," she said. She took a deep breath. "I'm not pregnant."

Haylie and I couldn't have been more happier for Sarah. It was a big sigh of relief. It was like she dodged a bullet. We were chalking her fiasco in the bathroom to bad seafood that she had eaten prior to the dance. We were literally jumping for joy.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

The Morning After


After Logan dropped me off last night, I couldn't remember what happened afterwards. I somehow ended up in my PJs without realizing I had changed. I was on autopilot and remembered laying awake for the majority of the night. I don't remember when I finally drifted off to sleep. I do know that when my alarm rang at 7:00, I stared at it like it was my enemy. I couldn't go back to sleep though.

I was numb. I was still in shock. I couldn't believe that Sarah might be pregnant. I remember bits and pieces from last night's conversation. I remember Sarah throwing up in the girls' bathroom multiple times. I remember how scared we were for her.

What are we going to do? Justin doesn't know yet. She's too scared to tell him. She's scared that he's going to leave her if she is pregnant. She doesn't realize how much he loves her. He's planning on proposing to her on graduation day. Haylie and I tried our best to convince her that Justin would never leave her. I remembered feeling so bad for him. He didn't know why his girlfriend was crying in the bathroom and refused to talk to him. He was devastated.

I wanted to call Sarah and make sure she's ok, but it's still early in the morning. I sent her a text asking if she was alright. I immediately got a text back.

Yea, I'm fine. Thanks for checking up on me. Can you bring me a test tomorrow morning?

Those words scared me. I didn't want her to know how scared I was for her. I told her I'll be there bright and early. I decided to get out of bed and take a nice long shower. I stepped into my room naked and drying my hair with my towel. To my surprise, I found Logan sitting on my bed, carrying two cups of coffee and breakfast.

"OMG! What are you doing here?" I yelled. I quickly wrapped the towel around myself.

"Uh, hey," he said, embarrassed. "Your sister let me in. I wanted to check up on you and I brought you breakfast. Do you want me to go?"

"No, you can stay," I said, mortified. "I just have to kill Brittany. Let me get dressed." I shooed him out of my room while I got dressed.

OMG. Could my weekend get any worse? I was naked in front of Logan. OMG. He saw everything. All of my flaws. All of my fat. Everything I hated about my body. He saw everything!

"Crap." I said. I had to go face Logan. I took a deep breath and walked to Brittany's room.

"Hey, Court," she said. "There's a guy here for you. He's cute." She smiled.

"Yeah, I know," I said, rolling my eyes. "You told him to sit in my room and he saw me naked."

"I didn't know that you walked around your room naked!" she said, laughing. "That hilarious!" I hit her with her pillow.

"It's not funny!" I cried. "Do you know how humiliating that is?"

"I'm sure he liked what he saw," she smirked.

"Shut up," I said. "I'll get you back." I left her room and went downstairs.

"You're welcome!" I heard her shout behind me.

I found Logan sitting at the breakfast bar. He had set out two plates and heated up the pancake breakfast he brought.

"I'm really sorry for walking in on you," he said.

"It's ok, I'll get over it," I said. "I probably can't ever look you in the face ever again."

"If it makes you feel better, I liked what I saw," he said, smirking.

"Shut up and eat your breakfast," I said, hitting him on the arm. He laughed.

I hate you Brittany.

Friday, October 23, 2009

The Dance

I don't want to bore you with all of the preparations for the dance. I had gotten ready at Haylie's house. I had my brown hair beautifully curled and stuck a blue clip in my hair to match my black and blue laced dress. My make up was kept natural. Haylie had to approve before I could leave her room.

Haylie had also kept it simple with a little black dress and pink earrings. She looked amazing even though her arm was still in a cast. Haylie was going to the dance with Adam. Henry couldn't get the night off of work to take her.

I was excited when the doorbell rang. Haylie went downstairs to answer the door.

"Courtney! Logan's here!" she said, popping her head into her room. I took a deep breath and slowly made my way downstairs. It was like one of those cheesy teen movies where the guy was waiting downstairs and he's all dressed up. He looks up and sees the girl and he smiles. Her heart melts and they fall completely in love. I couldn't help but smile. Logan looked amazing in his black dress shirt and blue tie.

"Hey," he said to me.

"Hi," I said.

"You look beautiful," he said, grinning. "Shall we go?" He took my hand.

"Do you want me to wait for Adam to get here, Haylie?" I asked her.

"I'm fine! Go!" she said, shooing us out of her house. Logan and I laughed.

We got into his car and went off to where the dance was held. He was nice enough to walk over to the passenger side and open the door for me. When we walked inside, there were already a sea of people there, dancing. We bypassed the dancers and took a seat in the back.

"Do you want anything to drink?" He yelled over the music. I nodded. He went off to fetch the drinks.

"HEY, COURTNEY!" I heard someone shout. I looked up and saw Sarah with Justin.

"Hey guys!" I shouted, waving at them. Logan came back with the drinks.

Logan wanted to dance. I didn't want to go. I am the world's worst dancer. I cannot coordinate myself to dance. It's just impossible. After five minutes of pleading, I gave in.

He lead me to the dance floor and we started to dance. Just my luck, the song changed to a slow song. I blushed and started to walk off the dance floor. Logan pulled me into his arms.

"Where are you going?" He asked, smiling. "Dance with me." I smiled and put my arms around his neck.

It was perfect. It felt like the song lasted forever. We were staring into each others' eyes and smiling like idiots. Logan was getting closer and closer to the point where our noses touched. I saw him getting ready to kiss me.

"You're beautiful," he said and went in for the kiss.

"Courtney!" a voice yelled. I jerked my head to the direction where the voice came from and smacked Logan in the face with my hair. I looked at Logan in embarrassment.

"I'm so sorry, Logan!" I cried, embarrassed.

"It's ok," he said, laughing.

"Courtney!" someone yelled again. I turned my head back to the same direction and saw Adam walking up to me.

"What?" I asked him, with a twinge of annoyance. Adam ruined the perfect kiss.

"Sarah's in the restroom crying," he told me. The annoyance went away and was replaced by worry.

"What's wrong? Why is she crying?" I asked. "Is she ok? Is she hurt?"

"I don't know!" Adam cried. I turned to Logan.

"I'm sorry," I said, wincing.

"Go check on Sarah," he said. I kissed him on the cheek and went to the girls' bathroom. I found Haylie kneeling down next to a sobbing Sarah.

"Honey, what's wrong?" I asked her. "Why are you crying?" Sarah took a deep breath.

"I think I'm pregnant," she blubbered. Haylie and I looked at each other in shock.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Forgive and Forget

(side note)

So, Adam, Haylie, and I went to go see a movie last night. It was a bizarre movie. (I'm not sure that I can say the name of the movie in my blog, but what the hey! Free advertisement for the movie if anyone reads this! :D ) The movie was Paranormal Activity. Anyways, I highly recommend seeing it. It makes you think whether or not there are spirits that roam around on earth after a person dies. Some pretty freaky stuff happens in that movie. Of course, this was just me advertising for the movie and has absolutely nothing to do with the post today. :)

(end of side note)

This morning in physiology, Logan apologized to me.

"I'm sorry for jumping to conclusions," he said. "I know that there's nothing going on between you and Adam. I'm just weird and overprotective of my friends."

"Yeah," I said. "I'm sorry for yelling at you." He smiled. He's cute when he smiles.

"So, I was hoping to make it up to you," he said. "How about you let me buy you a cup of coffee and we can hang out after school. Maybe do some of this physiology work?"

I took a second to recall what were my plans for today. Laundry. Study. Get a dress for the Back-to-School dance that was tomorrow. I don't have a date, but I don't mind going solo. Well, Haylie and I are going together as single chicks.

"Only for a little bit?" I asked. "I have to study and get a dress for tomorrow."

"Oh, you're going tomorrow?" he asked, curiously. I nodded and started writing on the worksheet we were given. "Who are you going with?"

"Haylie," I said. "We both don't have dates. So, we're going solo."

"Ah, I see," he said. "So, do you want to meet me in the parking lot after school?"

"Yeah," I said. The bell rang. "See you later." I walked out of class.

You'd think that I'd be excited about my "study date" with Logan, but I think I'm still annoyed at him because of yesterday. I know that he apologized, but it really irked me when he accused me of sleeping with Adam. It's starting to look like Logan is another Steve or Taylor and I don't want someone like Steve or Taylor to be my boyfriend. Maybe I'm casting my judgement too early.


I met up with Logan after school and he bought me that cup of coffee. It was cute when he refused to let me pay for his coffee. He kept complimenting me on everything and telling me sweet little things. I got a little red when our hands bumped when we were reaching for the packets of sugar. My feelings for him started to come back. It seemed like every little thing he did was adorable. He is breaking down the shield I had put up.

"Can I tell you something?" he asked me. I closed my physiology book.

"Sure," I said, looking at him. "What is it?"

"I was going to ask you to the dance, but I went psycho on you yesterday and then I decided not to," he admitted. "I had the whole thing planned out. I had bought roses and I had planned on leaving them on your desk and I had this bear that was dressed up in a tux that I was going to give to you. I know, lame." I looked at him in disbelief and awe.

"That is the sweetest thing that anyone has ever thought about doing for me," I said, blushing. "You're so sweet."

"Would you have said yes?" he asked me. He stared at me with his puppy dog eyes.

"Of course," I said, smiling.

"Hang on, I'll be right back," he said, grinning. He came back with the roses and the teddy bear. My jaw dropped.

"Wow." I said, in shock. He smiled.

"So, Courtney, will you go to the dance with me?" he asked.

"Yes," I said, softly. He hugged me.

I'm going to the dance with Logan.

Monday, October 19, 2009

The Shirt

Well, I guess I fell asleep because the next thing I knew, it was morning. Adam had his arm around me and we were sleeping really close together. It was kinda awkward.. To make things worse, he had a boner. I knew it was due to the fact that it's 7 in the morning and not because he's attracted to me.

I took his arm off of me and gently slipped out of his bed. I turned off the TV and grabbed my phone. There were no new messages. Brittany must have assumed that I slept over here. It wasn't unusual for me to fall asleep at my friends' houses after a night of studying. Our parents know each other well enough to allow such a thing.

"Hey," I said, shaking Adam. "Wake up. It's 7. Wake up or we're not going to make it to school."

"I'll be up in a little," he mumbled. "You can use my shower. I'll let you borrow one of my shirts."

"Ok," I said.

I think he was a little embarrassed about his boner and didn't want me to know about it. I really felt sorry for guys. I mean, sure, women have to have periods every month and they have to bear children and give birth, but guys have to conceal their boners.. That's super embarrassing! I couldn't imagine having to go through that as a pre-teen or now.

I took a quick shower and realized that I didn't take a shirt with me before I went in the bathroom. I wrapped the towel around myself and went into his room.

"Don't look!" I said. "I didn't grab a shirt before I went in." I didn't want him to see me in nothing but a towel. We're close, but not that close.

I tried to grab the shirt as quick as I could and jumped back into the bathroom. I changed and went to brush my teeth. I had my own toothbrush here. I felt so special! I went back into his room.

"All yours," I said. He got out of bed.

"Took you long enough," he joked.

"Haha, hurry up," I told him. It bugged me that my hair was wet, but Adam didn't own a hair dryer. He didn't believe in them. He's so weird. He came out of the shower in less than ten minutes.

We barely made it to school on time. It seemed like all of the traffic lights were red just to spite us. Well, I made it to my seat just before the bell rang. The teacher was MIA.

"Hey," I said to Logan. I put my stuff down. He looked at me. "What is it?"

"Isn't that shirt a little big for you?" he asked.

"Oh, I was studying at Adam's house last night and I fell asleep," I said. "I had to borrow one of his shirts." He looked skeptical.

"Uh huh," he said, in disbelief. "Let me guess, his shirt was off and his pants were down. What? Let me guess. He made you dinner and then he got in your pants." I rolled my eyes.

"What is your problem?" I said, angrily. "Who do you think you are? You don't even know me. You've known me for two seconds. What I do and what I don't do is none of your concern. Controlling much? You don't own me. I can do whatever I want."

Logan didn't say anything. He looked away sheepishly and stayed quiet for the rest of the class period, which was fine by me.

I couldn't get to my statistics class fast enough.

"Hey, Court," Haylie greeted me. She noticed my shirt. "Another study night at Adam's?" I nodded. Someone who understands! She only understands because she's been to one of our study sessions and she also fell asleep. Adam will offer anyone the shirt off of his back. In this case, the shirt from his dresser.

"Logan was being an asshole and accusing me of sleeping with Adam," I said.

"Not the cute barista!" She exclaimed. "Wait, you do know that Adam is secretly in love with you, right?" I laughed hysterically.

"Thanks, Hales, for the laugh," I said. "Cheered me up."

"No, really," she said, seriously. "Look at all of the things that he does for you."

"Hun, they're the same things I do for you!" I exclaimed. "We're good friends, you know that! You're being ridiculous!"

"If you say so," she said, shrugging.

Haylie has an overactive imagination. You can't really blame her, she's more on the creative side. At least she puts that talent to good use and writes short stories.

"How's your arm, sweetie?" I asked her. I felt bad that I didn't ask her before I went into my "Logan is an asshole" thing.

"It's fine," she said, annoyed. "I wish people would stop asking. It's a broken arm. It'll heal." I laughed.

"We're just worried about you," I said. I remembered Taylor's text. "Taylor texted me last night." Haylie looked both shocked and scared. Pretty much the same face I had last night.

"No," she said. "You're joking." I shook my head.

"He said, hey stranger," I said.

"What did you do?" she asked. "Did you text him back?"

"No," I said. "Why would I?"

"I'm glad you didn't," she said. "I wouldn't be able to stand it if he hurt you again."

Deja Vu.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Talk to the Hand

"Hey," Adam said, poking his head into the room. "I made you food. It's your favorite! Breakfast for dinner!"

"You made me brinner?" I asked, smiling. Adam knew just how to cheer me up. I threw my phone on his bed and headed downstairs with him. It smelled so good. He had made me scrambled eggs, bacon, sausages, and pancakes. Adam's scrambled eggs are the best! His secret is cinnamon. It sounds weird, but it's delicious! "This looks so good! Thank you!" He hugged me.

"No problem, Court," he said. I sat down and started eating. All of a sudden, Adam laughed. "You eat like a pig."

"I do not!" I said, laughing. I almost choked. He handed me a glass of water. I gladly drank it. "So, I'm not going to text him back."

"Good, I'm glad," he said. "I really hated what he did to you. You didn't deserve that."

"Yeah," I said. "I really don't like to think about it."

I remembered that after Taylor and I broke up, Adam and Henry went over to Taylor's house and kicked his ass. It made me feel so much better. They did what I couldn't do. I couldn't yell at Taylor, I couldn't slap him- all I did was cry.

I remembered going to school the next day and seeing Taylor with a black eye which he tried to cover up but failed miserably. Haylie had snapped a photo as a keepsake for me. I also used it as a target on my dartboard when I was venting my anger.

We finished dinner in silence.

We decided that studying was a bust and popped in one of our favorite movies of all time- Not Another Teen Movie. It's so ridiculous. It always cracks us up.

I absolutely love these study nights with Adam.

There's Something About Taylor

His name is Taylor. We met when I was a sophomore and he was a junior. I couldn't really say that he was good looking. I mean, he didn't make me want to throw up every time I saw him, but he wasn't hot. I think what really attracted me to him was his personality. He was sweet and kind.

The only problem was: he had a girlfriend.

Taylor had been with his girlfriend, Farrah, for over a year. He was over his relationship with her. They were always fighting, they never spent time together (due to her strict parents), and they never went on dates. He wanted to end things with Farrah but she had a problem with depression. She threatened to commit suicide if he ever broke up with her. He couldn't leave her and Farrah was oblivious to the fact that Taylor was miserable.

As Taylor and Farrah drifted apart, Taylor and I started getting closer and closer. We had started to talk to each other and realized that we had feelings for one another. I knew I was headed towards dangerous territory. I didn't care. I liked him too much.

For the next couple of months, we hung out after school everyday at my house. Taylor told me everything. He talked about his family. He talked about his girlfriend. He talked about school. He even talked to me about his dreams. He said he wanted a future with me and not Farrah. Then he kissed me.

The kiss was amazing. It felt like I was in one of those chick flicks where the guy finally admits that he's in love with the girl. The kiss was long and passionate. It was everything that I've ever dreamed of. It was the best first kiss a girl could ever have.

We kept our relationship quiet. He was still with his girlfriend. He couldn't break it off with her. He didn't want her to get hurt. Our relationship kept growing and growing, but no one knew that we were together.

He took me up to the mountains one night. You could see all of the city lights up there. It was just the two of us up there. We were sitting on a picnic blanket and enjoying our own little picnic. I remember that night so clearly.

"Court?" Taylor said, trying to get my attention. I was staring at the lights. I couldn't help but fall in love with this place. I broke out of my trance.

"Yea, babe?" I asked him.

"These last few months have been amazing," he said. "I've never felt this close to anyone. I love you, Courtney." I smiled. I finally heard the three words I've been longing to hear.

"I love you too, Taylor," I told him with a grin that could have lighted up Las Vegas.

As each day, each week, each month passed, I grew tired of having to keep our relationship a secret. It was June and summer was approaching. We had been together for almost 8 months when he finally broke it off with his girlfriend. I felt a sigh of relief when he did.

Farrah was a reck. She spread rumors about the girls who hung out with Taylor. She talked shit about them behind their backs. I only found out about this from our mutual friends. They told me that she couldn't stop complaining, whining, and crying about how much she missed Taylor. To make matters worse, she hated me. Only because Taylor and I hang out alot. She doesn't even know that we're secretly together. Like I said, she's really dense.

Taylor and I still carried out our relationship secretly. On the 4th of July weekend, I lost my virginity to him. He had pushed to have sex for a couple of months already and I had finally felt that I was ready. The sex was awful. I thought that it was supposed to be pleasurable, but it hurt so much! I don't think I'll ever have sex ever again.

A couple of weeks after we had sex, I had learned from Adam that Taylor wasn't being faithful. Adam had caught him at a coffee shop kissing a girl. He snapped a picture of it to present me with visual proof. I remembered that I had burst into tears. I couldn't believe that Taylor had cheated on me. I knew that he had cheated twice before. The first time was when he was in middle school and the second time was on Farrah. Now, it was a third time and the victim was me.

I thought that I had changed him. I thought that he had loved me enough to be committed to our relationship. I was wrong. I spent 2 months crying my eyes out and trying to get over him. It was the most difficult thing I've ever had to do. He had completely shattered my heart. I didn't think that I could trust a guy after that.

The worst part is: I lost my virginity to him and he broke up with me after we had sex. He didn't love me like I loved him.

That's what hurts the most.

Friday, October 16, 2009

So Sick

My phone vibrated for the millionth time today. I have a habit to ignore text messages and calls when I'm studying at Adam's house. We learned the hard way that phones are very very distracting. I finally slid open my phone and stared at the number. 555-9403.

It can't be. It can't be him. Not after all of this time.

I opened the text message only to see the words that I've dreaded for the last 9 months.

Hey, stranger.

The color drained from my face. I felt sick to my stomach. I didn't know what to do. He's trying to contact me again.

"Court, what's wrong?" Adam asked. "You look a little pale."

"I-" I started to say. I showed him the text message. He sat down next to me. He knew what this meant.

"Are you going to reply?" he asked.

"I don't know," I said, softly. Truthfully, I didn't know. Adam wrapped his arms around shoulders and pulled me closer to him. I've always felt so safe and protected in his arms. This time, I could smell the soap he used. He smelled really, really good. There is nothing sexier on a guy than the smell of soap. It was intoxicating. What am I doing? This is Adam we're talking about. I sighed. "What am I going to do, Adam?"

"I'll support whatever decision you make, Court," he said, kissing the top of my head. "You know what he did to you and I know how much he hurt you. I wouldn't be able to stand it if he hurt you again." I nodded.

"Can I have a few minutes alone to think?" I asked him. He nodded and left the room.

I really didn't know whether or not I should text him back. He had broken my heart a long time ago but he feels the need to pop in my life every once in a while. He was like an annoying pest that won't go away- no matter how much I want him to. Every couple of months he would "check up" on me. I thought he had forgotten about me when he didn't show up for the last 9 months.

Everytime he comes back, all the memories come flooding back in. I couldn't help but remember all the good times we had, all of the laughs we shared, all of the places we went. I couldn't help but take that trip down memory lane. As always, that trip down memory lane always leads to my heartbreak. The wave of sadness always kicks in when I think about him. I couldn't help but shed a tear.

Then again, I knew. I knew it couldn't have lasted. Not in a million years. No matter how much I loved him. Once a liar, always a liar. It was my fault that my heart got broken. I should have known better. I should have known not to have gotten involved with him. I wouldn't have to had dealt with all that drama and bullshit. It's more my fault than his. This was my karma for what I have done.

I stole someone's boyfriend.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

People Guide

Brittany ~ My fraternal twin who seemed to have inherited all the beauty in the family. She is the blonde hair, blue eyed American beauty of the family. She is kind of conceited and only cares about three things in her life- her quarterback boyfriend, her looks, and her clothes. She runs the high school due to her status of being the head cheerleader.

Haylie ~ My best friend since preschool. She is the person that I confide to about everything that goes on in my life. My relationship with Haylie is more sisterly, than best friends. Haylie is often the cheery one out of the two of us. We were nicknamed The Dos Brunettes (pronounced Bru-net-tes) by the cheerleading squad in their efforts to torment us.

Adam ~ My guy best friend and met him in preschool. He is an amazing guy. Blond hair, blue eyes, intelligent, polite, cute, sweet, funny, and charming - everything a girl can ask for. He always listens to me when I babble about my problems.

Logan ~ The cute barista. He is the embodiment of tall, dark, and handsome. He's in my physiology class and keeps sending me mixed singals.

Henry ~ Guy number two in our group. He is hopeless in love with Haylie- has been since kindergarten. He can't take no for an answer (or take a hint). Looks like an average Joe.

Sarah ~ Chick numero three in our group and Justin's longtime girlfriend. They've been together since the 7th grade. She chills with us whenever she can. She splits her time between the school, Justin, work, clubs, and volunteer work. She is the ultimate overachiever.

Justin ~ Guy number three in our group and Sarah's boyfriend. We barely see him. He is always working. He's trying to save up for an engagement ring for Sarah. Shhh. It's a secret. :)

Steve ~ An asshole. I don't know what Haylie ever saw in him. He is a player and thinks he's all that and a cup of coffee. Haylie forced us to pretend to like him and to let him hang out with our group. Can anyone say mistake?

First Day of Senior Year

When I woke up today, the first thought that popped into my head was "Oh, boy."

It was the first day of school. Usually, I'm excited, but with Haylie in the hospital, I'm really not in the mood for school. I just want to go over to the hospital and stay by her side. I dragged myself out of bed and tried stay positive. I'm going to need some positiveness if I'm going to send Haylie some positive energy. Her parents didn't give me an update yet, probably because they were up all night worrying.

I was planning on walking to school, but when I got outside, Adam was waiting for me in his car. I couldn't say I was surprised. Adam and I were really close. I've known him as long as I've known Haylie. Adam was amazing. He's cute, sweet, and funny. If you need a favor, he is there in a heartbeat. Don't let his blond hair and blue eyes fool you, he's as smart as Albert Einstein.

"Hey, Mr. Smith, are you here to give me a ride?" I asked, smiling.

"Hop in, Mrs. Smith," he laughed. Everyone in our own little group referred to us as Mr. and Mrs. Smith. I don't remember when we were dubbed that, but it was pretty funny. Adam did look a little like Brad and I did look a little like Angie minus the gorgeous face. "Do you want to stop for breakfast?"

"Of course!" I exclaimed. He knows just how to distract me and cheer me up. He brought us to a drive-thru and ordered my favorite breakfast burrito with some orange juice. I fished out my wallet but he wouldn't hear of it. He's such a gentleman. He doesn't believe that the girl should pay for anything. I took a sip of my juice.

"Do you want to go see Hales after school?" He asked. I nodded.

For the rest of the ride to Beachside, we tried to see if we had any classes together. We only had psychology together and that was near the middle of the day. We finally got on campus. The thing about our campus is that it overlooks the beach and the ocean. It's amazing to see the gorgeous blue sky and the white sand everyday.

Adam came around the side and opened the door for me. He's so nice that way. He walked me to my physiology class while talking about rounding up the group to see Haylie.

I took a seat in the back of the class. I was never one to sit in the front of the class. I figured out that teachers tend to call on those who sit in the front. I don't have a problem sitting near the middle, but I'm closer to the back door where I'm currently sitting. I put my backpack on my desk and started to watch people walk in the door. To my surprise, Logan walked in. He saw me and took a seat next to me.

"Hey, you," I said, smiling. "You remembered me."

"Course," He said, laughing. "Can't forget a pretty face." I laughed nervously. I was not pretty. That boy needs glasses or something. Maybe he hit his head on his locker or something. I was not pretty.

"Sure," I said.

"So, was that your boyfriend I saw you with?" he asked, coolly. I burst out laughing. I couldn't help it. The thought of dating Adam was just so ridiculous.

"Adam?" I said, laughing. "I think you made my day. We're really close friends. I've known him since I was in preschool. It would be insanely weird if we were dating."

"Oh, you guys looked like you guys were dating," he said. "I saw you getting out of his car when I was in the parking lot."

He sounded a little jealous. Maybe it's just me and I'm suffering a bout of hallucination or something. I decided not to push it and not give him the third degree. I'm pretty sure he has a girlfriend and I don't want to look like an idiot.

"Yep, just friends," I said. The bell rang signalling that class had started.

After class, Logan insisted on walking me to my statistics class.

"Do you want to get together after school and work on the psych assignment?" he asked.

"No, I can't, I have to go to the hospital," I said.

"Why?" he asked, curiously.

"I'm going to visit my best friend Haylie," I said. "We were in a car accident yesterday and I managed to come out with a couple of bruises, but she has a broken arm and they had to keep her overnight. Oh, wait." I checked my phone and there was a message from Mrs. Conner.

Haylie's doing fine. We're taking her home right now.

"Scratch that, we're going over to her house." I said. "Her parents took last night off and today off so they could be with her." Her parents were workaholics and usually worked at night.

We stood outside of my stats class and I waited for him to say something, but he didn't.

"Um, ok, I'm going to go to class," I said. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah, bye," he replied. I went to my stats class.

There was nothing interesting that happened at school. I managed to have someone I knew in every single one of my classes so if I get lost, someone can catch me up.

After school, we ended up getting Henry and Sarah to join us. Justin couldn't come because he had to go to work. He worked at this really cool bookstore. It keeps him pretty busy. He barely has enough time for Sarah let alone the rest of us. Sarah and Justin have been together since... Since.. I don't remember. That's how long they've been together. I think it was somewhere in 7th grade when they started seeing each other.

"We're here, guys," Adam announced, parking his car on the street.

We piled out of the car and I let us in with my spare key. Mr. and Mrs. Conner gave me a key to their house when Haylie and I started high school. They actually trusted me with the key more than Hales. She tends to lose things easily.

"Hey, kids," Mr. Conner greeted us. "Hale Bale is upstairs watching TV."

"Thanks, Mr. Conner," Sarah said, politely. We headed upstairs and went in Haylie's room.

"Hey guys," she greeted us, smiling. "How was the first day of senior year?"

"That doesn't matter, " I said.

"What matters is you," Henry jumped in. I tried not to roll my eyes.

"That's really sweet," Haylie said. "But, I'm fine. Just a little bruised, a broken arm, and little head injury. I don't have a concussion. I'm fine, guys. Just gotta learn how to text with one hand." She smiled.

"Have you heard from.." Sarah trailed off.

"Nope," Haylie said. "We're broken up. I mean, Court, you saw how he was in the car last night."

"Yeah, I'm really glad you guys took your time in your relationship," I said. I glanced over at Henry. I could see that he was silently cheering. I could tell that he wanted to be Haylie's first. I honestly don't know if they would ever end up together. They would make a nice couple.

"We should let you get some rest," Adam said. "You must be exausted." She nodded.

"Ok, guys," she said. "I'll see you guys tomorrow at school." We said our goodbyes to her.

Adam drove each of us home.

I sat in my room wondering about Logan. Was he trying to ask me out for today? Was it supposed to be a study date? Maybe that was why he acted kinda funny. I don't know. I really suck with guys.

Sunday, October 11, 2009


I really don't know what to say. I just came home from the hospital and my best friend, Haylie, is still there.

This is what happened:

Haylie had a get together at her house to celebrate the last day of summer. It was a very small party that consisted of our closest friends. Our closest friends consist of Justin, Adam, Sarah, Henry, and Haylie's boyfriend Steve. There wasn't any booze there, just FYI. Haylie and I just don't roll that way.

Justin, Adam, Sarah, Henry and I were watching TV and we heard arguing outside. It was Haylie and her boyfriend. She was trying to break up with him and he wasn't taking it well.

"You're a little slut. You're fucken sleeping with Justin, aren't you?" Steve yelled.

"Steve, there's no one else. It's just you. You're an asshole. You don't treat me right. You're out sleeping with other girls behind my back. I'm done with you!" Haylie spat out. "Get out! Get out of my yard, get out of life!" He slapped her. We all rushed outside.

"Hales, are you ok?" I asked her. She was crying. She shook her head. I looked up. The guys had Steve wrestled to the ground.

"Haylie, what do you want us to do with this jackass?" Henry asked.

"Make him go away. He's been drinking." she said, sniffling. "I don't ever want to see him ever again."

"It's ok, sweetie," Sarah said. "We'll make sure that he never comes near you." The guys made sure that Steve left and we calmed Haylie down.

"How about you stay at my place, hun?" I asked. "I don't want him coming back tonight while you're here alone."

"Ok, Court," she said, softly.

"I'll drive you," Henry volunteered.

God. I swear, Henry is a little too desperate. He's had a crush on Haylie since kindergarten. He does all these things for her and Haylie is dense. She has no idea that he's secretly in love with her. Even when Henry bought her roses for Valentine's day because Steve forgot to get her anything, she didn't think anything of it. "He's just being nice, Court." I rolled my eyes at her.

So, Haylie and I were in Henry's car waiting for him to get his stuff out of the house. We had the keys in the ignition and the radio blasting. All of a sudden the door opened and the car peeled out of the driveway. I fell to the floor.

"OMG! Steve!" Haylie shouted. "What the hell are you doing?"

"You're going back to my place." Steve said, angrily. "You're going to fucken have sex with me, dammit. I am fucken Steve Richie. I can get any girl I want. You're not going to be the girl I failed to fuck."

"No, I'm not!" she shouted. She tried the door. "I will never have sex with you!"

"Don't even bother. Childlocks." He spat out.

"Let us out!" I shouted.

"What the fuck?" Steve said. "You're here too?" I couldn't get up. He kept making sharp turns and he was jerking back and forth.

"Steve! STEVE!" Haylie shouted. All I heard was a crash. I remembered hitting my head. The car had stopped. I pulled myself up. I saw that Haylie was unconscious. Her head was bleeding. Steve was barely moving. I picked up my cell phone and called 911.

"911, what is your emergency?" the dispatcher asked.

"I was in a car accident. The driver and the passenger are unconscious." I said.

"Ma'am, do you know where you are?" she asked. I looked out the window and saw part of a street name. Mason and something.. Wait..

"Mason and Snell." I said. "We're on Mason and Snell."

"The ambulance is on its way." she said. I spent the next could minutes talking to the dispatcher and telling her how the accident happened.

The ambulance came and took us to the hospital. Steve was fine. He just passed out because of the alcohol. He was taken into custody and was being charged. All I know is that he's going to sit in jail and his court date is in two weeks. I'm pretty sure that he has to pay damages because it was Henry's car.

The doctors checked me out. All I had were some bruises. I'm lucky. Haylie, on the other hand, had a broken arm but no concussion. I think they're going to keep her there overnight to make sure that she's ok. I checked in on her, but she was sleeping.

"She'll be ok, Courtney," her mom said.

"I know, Mrs. Conner." I said. "Do you want me to stay here overnight?"

"No, you should go home and rest," she said. "You have school tomorrow."

"Keep me updated?" I asked.

"Of course," she said.

Now I'm back at home. I'm really sore and I can't stop worrying about Haylie. Hopefully, they'll give me an update before school tomorrow.

Sunday, October 4, 2009

A Day to Remember

I walked into the small cafe on the corner of 10th Street. The smell of roast coffee was a breath of fresh air. I loved the smell of coffee on a Sunday morning, especially in this cafe.

I ordered my usual small black coffee and sat in my usual seat on the two seater sofa. The seat was perfect because I could watch the cute barista fill his orders. It's not like he would give me the time of day. Me? Courtney Cryme? Please. My twin, maybe. Brittany was the one who was into all the makeup wearing, short skirts, sexy tops, fabulous hair type of thing. I'm just a bookworm who happens to be great at being invisible.

I took my laptop out of my bookbag and started to organize my photos from summer. Brittany and I had stayed home alone while my parents went on their fourth honeymoon. Was it their fourth honeymoon or fifth? I can't remember. While our parents were in Paris, Brittany and I spent our days on the beach. My summer consisted of tanning and watching Brittany get hit on by hot guys. There was this one guy who liked me, but I don't want to talk about him.

"Nice pics," a voice said. I looked up and saw the cute barista staring at the pictures. "Is that our beach?"

I tried not to get too excited. THE CUTE BARISTA WAS TALKING TO ME!!!

"Yea, my sister and I spent our summer there," I managed to say.

"That's sick!" the cute barista said. He sat down next to me. "Do I know you? You seem kinda familar."

Yeah, I'm the girl who is semi-stalking you because you are one cute barista.

"I don't think so," I said. "I'm Courtney." I smiled a little.

"Cool, I'm Logan," he said. Now I know the cute barista's name. He noticed the sweatshirt I was wearing. "You go to Beachside High? I do too. What class?"

"Senior class," I said. "You?"

"Seniors!!" he shouted. I couldn't help but laugh.

"Logan! Stop flirting with the customers and get back to work!" the lady behind the regrister yelled. "I don't pay you to flirt, I pay you to work."

"I guess I have to go," Logan said to me, a little embarrassed. "Sorry."

"It's ok, go back to work and make some moolah," I said. Crap. I just said moolah in front of Logan. He laughed.

"Moolah, you're cute," he said. The lady glared at him. "I really have to go, I'm sorry."

Was it just me or did it seem like he was a little disappointed that he had to leave? What an interesting way to end summer.

Friday, October 2, 2009


My name is Courtney Cryme and the only thing that makes me unique is my twin sister, Brittany. I am a teenager who is going through life and is finally getting the opportunity to experience new things. They say to write what you know. Well.. Here goes.